marriage

i'm not awol, just can't keep track of where i'm at or in what time zone.  while i continue to question that, i wanted to pause for a moment and share.  if you had the opportunity and interest to watch the royal wedding, it may sound familiar, if not, it's an absolute must read.

i watched the wedding by accident, and for a few reasons ended up being glad i had done so, this speech by the bishop of london being the greatest among them.  it is a wonderful explanation of and tribute to marriage.

Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.” So said St Catherine of Siena whose festival day it is today. Marriage is intended to be a way in which man and woman help each other to become what God meant each one to be, their deepest and truest selves.

Many are full of fear for the future of the prospects of our world but the message of the celebrations in this country and far beyond its shores is the right one – this is a joyful day! It is good that people in every continent are able to share in these celebrations because this is, as every wedding day should be, a day of hope.  

In a sense every wedding is a royal wedding with the bride and the groom as king and queen of creation, making a new life together so that life can flow through them into the future.

William and Catherine, you have chosen to be married in the sight of a generous God who so loved the world that he gave himself to us in the person of Jesus Christ.

And in the Spirit of this generous God, husband and wife are to give themselves to each another.

A spiritual life grows as love finds its centre beyond ourselves. Faithful and committed relationships offer a door into the mystery of spiritual life in which we discover this; the more we give of self, the richer we become in soul; the more we go beyond ourselves in love, the more we become our true selves and our spiritual beauty is more fully revealed. In marriage we are seeking to bring one another into fuller life.

It is of course very hard to wean ourselves away from self-centredness. And people can dream of doing such a thing but the hope should be fulfilled it is necessary a solemn decision that, whatever the difficulties, we are committed to the way of generous love.

You have both made your decision today – “I will” – and by making this new relationship, you have aligned yourselves with what we believe is the way in which life is spiritually evolving, and which will lead to a creative future for the human race.

We stand looking forward to a century which is full of promise and full of peril. Human beings are confronting the question of how to use wisely a power that has been given to us through the discoveries of the last century. We shall not be converted to the promise of the future by more knowledge, but rather by an increase of loving wisdom and reverence, for life, for the earth and for one another.

Marriage should transform, as husband and wife make one another their work of art. It is possible to transform as long as we do not harbour ambitions to reform our partner. There must be no coercion if the Spirit is to flow; each must give the other space and freedom. Chaucer, the London poet, sums it up in a pithy phrase:

“Whan maistrie [mastery] comth, the God of Love anon,

Beteth his wynges, and farewell, he is gon.”

As the reality of God has faded from so many lives in the West, there has been a corresponding inflation of expectations that personal relations alone will supply meaning and happiness in life. This is to load our partner with too great a burden. We are all incomplete: we all need the love which is secure, rather than oppressive, we need mutual forgiveness, to thrive.

As we move towards our partner in love, following the example of Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit is quickened within us and can increasingly fill our lives with light. This leads to a family life which offers the best conditions in which the next generation can practise and exchange those gifts which can overcome fear and division and incubate the coming world of the Spirit, whose fruits are love and joy and peace.

I pray that all of us present and the many millions watching this ceremony and sharing in your joy today, will do everything in our power to support and uphold you in your new life. And I pray that God will bless you in the way of life that you have chosen, that way which is expressed in the prayer that you have composed together in preparation for this day:

God our Father, we thank you for our families; for the love that we share and for the joy of our marriage.

In the busyness of each day keep our eyes fixed on what is real and important in life and help us to be generous with our time and love and energy.

Strengthened by our union help us to serve and comfort those who suffer. We ask this in the Spirit of Jesus Christ. Amen.

vegas

finally, a vegas trip MY way.

the one and only conference that i just get to attend, and my co-worker diana and i had booked rooms at one of the new city center properties: vdara.

vdara is a non-smoking, non-casino, all suite hotel, and though it's on the strip, the complex of sister hotels and residences is so large that you can't see or hear the strip unless you are on a high floor.  definitely my favorite hotel to date.

workshops went well, but after we were finished, diana and i decided to have some fun.  we went shopping!
i was on the hunt for sunglasses and she was on the hunt for tiffany's. i am happy to report that we were both successful.

not ready to call it a night yet, we headed next door to bellagio where we were amazed to find it in 'full bloom'.  we had no idea we would be walking into spring, and we just couldn't get enough.  between the tulip fields (my favorite!) and the butterfly house, and the merry-go-round, we were giggling little children!

we made a stop for dinner before heading outside to watch the water show out front, and ended up staying for three shows, talking and enjoying the aquatic performance before calling it a night.

the next morning, we finished up our workshops, and spent our last couple of hours in vegas getting hot stone pedicures, thanks to a groupon we bought last month.  after almost two weeks on the road, it was the perfect way to finish off the trip before heading home.

toronto

with back to almost back trips to new york and toronto, i opted to stay in new york (as previously blogged) before heading out of the country.

since my company does not do business in canada, this was an unusual event for us, and i won't go into the details of why we attended. suffice it to say that there were good reasons, and the result was a border crossing.

my plane landed (still not sure how) in a blizzard, and sadly, as a result of the bitterly cold weather, we didn't get to do much exploring.  having been to toronto several times in my former life, i wasn't overly compelled to sacrifice frozen eyelashes for sight seeing opportunities, but my co-worker julianne and i did at least make it to the cn tower where we enjoyed the views and the photo opps.

the entire trip was low-key and enjoyable, with some of my favorite colleagues along,which was a nice way to spend the middle leg of a three city tour.  it was bye-bye toronto, hello vegas. again.

for more pics, click here

new york: day 3

though i spent most of the day working, i had big plans for my last night in new york.

before heading to the city i connected with my uncle in the hopes of seeing him and the rest of my ny family.   it was then that i learned that my cousin sonja had done the aerial choreography for daniel radcliffe's new (revival) broadway play 'how to succeed in business without really trying,' and i couldn't have been more excited for her.

sonja is six years older than me, and for many years, she and dylan and i were the only cousins on my dad's side.  i am sure that there were many times she wished for cousins closer to her age, but dylan and i never once felt unwanted or excluded from any activities at our annual family gatherings.  in fact, when i think back on it now, i simply do not know how such patience is possible...after all, what 15 year old wants an 8 year old tag along.

as a result of her unceasing graciousness, and also because she was just so fun to be with, i absolutely idolized her.  as an adult, that idolatry has evolved into great respect.  she always had a passion for the theater, and while i shared a similar love, i was not willing to make the sacrifices so often required to pursue that particular passion and chose a safer path, while she made those sacrifices and dedicated herself to the exploration of that art, in many of it's facets.  and while to some it may seem that the journey (so far) has taken an unusual path, she has found a way to live her dream, and i couldn't be more proud of or happy for her.

so, you can imagine why i was so thrilled when my uncle kim suggested that she might be able to get tickets for us to see the show, which was still in previews.

now, full disclosure time: this is a show that i did in high school, and, well...i'm not such a fan.  in fact, it may have been the least favorite production from my entire theater experience.  but, i was truly excited to see her work, and hey, who doesn't like harry potter!?

she was able to get two tickets, and she and kim, and 8 year old sam and i met for dinner before the show.  it's been a couple of years since we had seen each other (more for sonja and i) and we enjoyed yummy italian and more importantly, each other's company.

i have said it so many times before, and i cannot say it enough:  i am so fortunate in my family, and even more fortunate to have so many opportunities to be reminded of that.

as we were wrapping up dinner, my aunt mary arrived, and she and i headed off to the show to catch up in between the musical action.  it was so great to have some dedicated time with her, and to hear first hand about some of the recent health issues she has faced, while feeling more comforted that she is on the mend.

and the show itself, was, against all odds, TREMENDOUS!  that sounds like a broadway word, doesn't it? :)
truly, i absolutely loved the show.  i spent the whole evening laughing and wondering why i had ever disliked it!  daniel radcliffe was so darling and perfect for the role, and i was impressed by his musical chops.  narration by anderson cooper and john larroquette as co-star didn't hurt  none either. i cannot recommend this show highly enough - just go in with a sense of humor about 1950s stereotypes and you will not be able to help but have a good time.

at the conclusion of the play, i walked mary to the subway station and we made our bittersweet farewells.  it was the perfect way to bid adieu to the city of lights.

for more pics, click here

new york: day 2

day 2 of my 'fun time' in new york was spent with my dear friend angela.

i now angela from our time spent together in virginia, but for the last few years, she has been living in florida.  for the last couple of years, i've been able to spend some time with her there while in town for my big january conference, but i missed her this year thanks to her recent move to new york.

lucky for me, this event gave me an opportunity to catch up with her again, and, as always with angela, it was quite an adventure!

it started as a result of my intense aversion to solo subway riding in new york.

of all the public transportation systems i've braved, and there have been many (and many with foreign language challenges), new york is the only one that absolutely terrifies me, and which, i will never, on pain of death, attempt by myself.  it probably comes as a result of having terrible subway experienced with seasoned new york riders, but regardless of the cause, i simply cannot do it.

since angela lives in queens, it meant i'd have to suck it up and pay for a cab, which i was happy to do, on the condition that she'd drive me back to manhattan at the end of our day.  she agreed, and in the pouring rain i hailed a taxi to take me across the 59th street bridge.

but, as if the rain and the guilt i felt from making this driver take me to an outer burrough weren't enough, about half way across the bridge the car started moving oddly.  at first i thought maybe the bridge was heavily potholed, but it wasn't long before i realized that we had a flat tire.  a very flat tired, as a matter of fact, and with every rotation, it got flatter, leaving us, by the end, riding on the rims.

when we got to the far side of the bridge, he asked if he could drop me off at the subway station.  i told him that was fine and i'd figure it out.  lucky for him (particularly when i saw how seriously trashed his tire and rim was) his garage was about two blocks away.  unlucky for me, it was raining, and i was about twenty blocks from my destination.  at that point, i was ready to face my demons, until i realized that it was an above ground station, with three flights of wet metal steps ahead of me.  my resolve crumbled with visions of knees twisting and falling and ipads and iphones being stolen while my body lay a twisted heap on the sidewalk, and i walked the twenty blocks.

when i arrived, only slightly worse for the wear, and with a great story to tell, things were far less exciting, but so much more enjoyable!

i got to meet angela's daughter for the first time, and see how much her son had grown.  we were able to catch up on life and love (-less, in my case) and play angry birds and hide and seek and watch star wars and laugh and laugh some more. and when steve came home, he joined us for what was a muy delicioso dinner, 'thrown together' but one of the best cooks i've ever known.

i am always so grateful and so happy to spend time with 'old friends' who know me so well, and who i can be so completely myself with. it is a wonderful blessing to have such wonderful girlfriends, with whom time forms no barriers.

for more pics, click here