bucket list, #345

i wish i actually had a bucket list. an official one. where items on said list had numbers, and could be crossed off or check-marked, providing the immense satisfaction that us virgos can only get by crossing things off lists.  sadly, i don't.

i should add that to my 'to do' list.

suffice it to say that even though it's very unofficial and does not require ink or a keypad to log completion, i do have a running list of things i want to do, try, see, in my head. one of those things was to see one of the summertime movie screenings in the hollywood forever cemetery.

check.

having removed myself from a work trip to vancouver canada due to sheer travel exhaustion, i was home for an entire weekend.  when my friend jami asked if i'd be interested in seeing 'dawn of the dead' at the hollywood cemetery, i jumped at the chance.

we were joined by a newish (to me) friend, whitney, and came prepared with our chairs, snacks, and mst3k (mystery science theater 3,000) style commentary. having never seen the movie before, i was fascinated to learn how many story lines from my current obsession, the walking dead, seemed very similar to its zombie predecessor.

we enjoyed the movie, the people watching, and the cemetery itself. we wandered the portions of the ground that the security guards would allow, enjoying the sheer grandeur of site.

we also wandered into a line that turned out to be a themed 'photo booth'  with a professional photographer, and assistants carefully directing the smoke, providing a perfectly eerie setting for our group photo.

it was a perfect way to cross this one off the intangible but completely real, bucket list.

vegas cinemagraphs

testing testing

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back in the groove

last night at 6:30 or so, sitting in my room, backing up my hard drive before sending the macbook in to apple care for repair, my newly engaged roommate ariane comes in to ask me if i will take her engagement photos... ’like…now?’. as it happens, ariane is getting married on saturday. though the engagement is new, and the wedding quick, that is not the story arc i will be discussing in this post. but rather, the request for photos.

i wasn’t feeling all that well last night (female stuff), so i asked aynsley to come along and be responsible for the ‘posing’ of the couple. she volunteered to contact her ex, who has a much nicer camera, to see if he would loan it out. he agreed, which meant ayns would be taking the photos. that was fine, although i was semi-disappointed at the missed opportunity to continue building my portfolio. i went along for the ride nonetheless.

we picked up the camera and headed to the huntington beach pier to commence the photo shoot. i decided to go ahead and take a few shots around aynsley and her fancy shmancy camera. when all was said and done, and all of the photos from the three memory cards perused (ayns took about 200, i took about 30), ariane and her beau narrowed the pictures down to their three favorites. all three were mine.

– insert moment of triumph here –

the ‘winning’ picture, for use in the email invitation is:


every time something like this happens, i get frustrated and annoyed. my composition is usually pretty on target, but the picture quality between a point and shoot and a dslr is noticeable. i need a camera!!

based on last evening’s results, the couple have asked that i take the wedding photos, using a dslr belonging to ariane’s father. i’ve agreed and it will be my first actual wedding. and by actual wedding, i mean, it will be the first time i’m not hovering behind the ‘real’ photographer to get a shot. though I have been asked before, i have always declined as a result of my relationship with the couple. wedding photos can’t be redone. if you screw up, that’s that. But I know they are on a tight (virtually nonexistent) budget, and they’ve seen my photos and they like them. So it looks like I will in fact have another opportunity to build the portfolio, so that when i am really ready to do this, I’ve got some history behind me.

the wedding will be taking place on the beach, near sunset, which will hopefully allow for some amazing photos!

reactions

it's safe to say that my response to learning that i would be laid off in three months falls into either the 'absolute denial' or 'absolute faith' category. i'm not sure which yet, and maybe a little of both.

on the one hand, i know with certainty that this job, this company, and these co-workers were meant to be a part of my experience here. since the end of this chapter comes not at the tip of my own pen, i can only assume that it's conclusion was also meant.

as my commenting friends pointed out, i am lucky. most people don't get the kind of warning i've gotten, and i'm grateful for that.

on the other hand, another job search. job searches are exhausting. they test your endurance, your ability to please, and yes, even your self-worth. and i just did this. in fact, i was doing this 6 months ago. now i am doing it again? i know that for two years i was desperate for change. i know i sort of asked for it. but come on! isn't this over-correcting a little bit?

upon learning the news that my guaranteed income was no longer guaranteed, i did what any self-respecting red-blooded american would do. i went shopping.

not just any kind of shopping, but camera shopping, mind you.

a couple of years ago i owned a sony point and shoot. i hated everything about it and swore that i would never buy sony agan. fast forward to february '08 and my last camera has had it's final farewell. i am so lured in by a touchscreen, and on camera red eye fixing, and 5x optical zoom, that i barely notice the large chunk of change i'm laying out, is for a sony.

well my friends, me and that sony have had quite the love hate relationship. mostly hate actually. the biggest problem is that the pictures are awful. i have to do a lot of photoshopping to get semi-decent quality pics. and i am far from being a photoshop wiz.

so it was time for a new camera and a smarter choice. i am absolutely thrilled with my new purchase...particularly the custom self-timer. if you've ever posed for a self-portrait with me, you'll know how long that 10 second timer lasts. but now, i can set the timer from 1 - 30 seconds, and to take 1 - 10 shots. 10 seconds just got a lot shorter, folks!

after the new purchase, i did some number crunching and determined that i should be able to sell my sony and it's acoutrements, for enough to cover the cost of the new camera. so, basically, i just got a free camera and it's way cooler than my expensive one.

good timing too, as the weekend is chock full of activities!

the portland recap

just a matter of time...

lately, it seems everyone is starting photography businesses. combined with the gentle prodding of close friends (lara in particular), i've been giving some thought to doing the same. it is no secret to any of you that i love taking photos. whether i love being in them more, is debatable, but for the purpose of this monologue, we'll just forget about that.

over the years i have done engagement and wedding photos for friends and family, and i suppose it was just a matter of time before i gave serious thought to making a business out of it. truth is, i still have absolute confidence that marriage and family are in my future, and in an ideal world, i will be able to stay at home with the kids. with that in mind, i have been pondering for years what viable 'side-business' i could implement. the obvious answer was event planning, but to get an event planning company up and running would take a lot more legwork. photography is something i love equally well, and is probably equally lucrative, with less time investment required.

so, the 'official' launch of this new business is probably six months off...pending relocation, the purchase of a new camera, and photoshop classes. the camera is the big roadblock at the moment. i simply can't afford to invest without having any idea where my income will be coming from at the end of september, and i don't think anyone will take me seriously with my point and shoot...even if it is 10mp.

in the meantime, i'm trying to put the pieces in place so that when i am ready to go, i am READY to go. the first piece for me was beginning the website. it's still a work in progress, but feel free to check it out and comment. constructive criticism is always welcome!

spotlit photography

*****

in other news, kate and kendyl are moving back from nashville at the end of the month. needless to say, the info came as a surprise, particularly after having spent 20+ hours in a van moving her there only two months ago. nonetheless, it was great news to all of us, and means that i get a little more time than i thought i did!

*****

i had a dream about my future husband last night. he was tall, dark haired, and 37. today i have been scouring all the mormon singles sites in search of him. it's possible he's 36 and will be turning 37, and it's also possible that he is the brother of someone i know. so, if you have a brother who is tall, dark haired, single, and 36 or 37, send him my way. you could be personally responsible for my eternal happiness! (ps...lara, you know who does not qualify as your brother--he came up in my search today--even though you have known him so long).