the midsingles conference

the kayak crew

every year several hundred mormon midsingles (singles in roughly the 27-45 age range) converge on my former hometown of huntington beach for a weekend of activities, workshops, and mingling. and every year i look forward to it with dread.

i always feel like i should participate, particularly  since it's in my back yard, and people come (literally) from all over the world to attend.  but i've learned about myself that i don't do well in large groups, so it is an anxiety ridden 72 hours for me.  so much so that i've skipped out on it for the last couple of years.

this year, though, the schedule was much more appealing...i even begged off a work trip in order to attend.  maybe it's the sentimentality of knowing that it will probably be my last, or maybe it's just that it seemed organized in such a way as to create smaller (better) group interactions, but i found myself looking forward to it this year for the first time...ever.

the festivities started on friday, but as i was traveling home from a work event in houston, i missed day one.  i finally arrived home on friday night/saturday morning at about 1am after flight delays and local traffic jams, and i knew saturday morning would come way too fast.  in fact, i wasn't 100% committed to attending the morning workshops, but i would try.

when the alarm went off, i decided to get up, move around a bit,  and see how i felt.  i felt okay. not awesome.  definitely in need of more sleep.  but okay enough to suck it up and participate. so i did.  jamie and i headed to huntington, and though we were on time, we found seats near the middle of the cultural hall overflow.

clint and tara's kayak selfie

the first workshop speaker was probably fine, but i was so tired, and his voice so constant, that it was a struggle to stay awake. after he concluded, we moved up to cushier seats for the highlighted speaker, sister kristen oaks (wife of apostle dallin oaks).  she was much easier to stay awake for! she was charming and engaging and funny and self-deprecating -- a real pleasure to listen to.

when she concluded, we grabbed our bagged lunches, found our friends, and spent the lunch hour chatting and catching up.  i had decided that, since my travel makes it hard for me to participate in any normal choir,  i would also participate in the choir practice that would take place at the latter half of the lunch break, and would sing in the sunday meetings the following day.

the aquarium after dark

it was there that i met my new friend clint. he'd come from yuma, az and we were insta bffs for the day.  choir practice was rough on all of us as they had only about six copies of the music for 40 people, but we were promised there would be enough music at the sunday practice.

during this time i was debating about whether or not i was going to participate in the afternoon kayaking that i had signed up for.  i had actually registered for that before registering for the conference. i loved the idea of the smaller group, and an alternative to just laying around on the beach feeling judgy and self-conscious.  but i was TIRED! and, for a californian, it was a bit chilly.

again, and contrary to my nature, i decided to suck it up.  jami was asked to be our group leader so i was able to beg her not to be too hard on my tired body.:)  when we arrived and everyone started checking in, i discovered that my new bff, clint, was also in the group, and when we were told to pair off, he asked if we could be partners.

jenn, kristina, larysa, and i

we spent the next couple of hours getting to know each other and the others in our group, while enjoying what turned out to be a beautiful sunny afternoon, weaving in and around newport harbor.  despite my exhaustion, i was really glad i had decided to go through with it.

i was planning on getting in a power nap between kayaking and the evening activity, but the timing just didn't work.  so, i powered through.  the dinner/dance was being held at the long beach aqauarium (which i love!), so i knew that even if the social aspect was a bust, that i would really enjoy the setting.  and it truly was amazing.  being there as a private group, after hours, was very very cool.  and it also afforded the opportunity to spend some time with my girls, catch up with my friend ben, and reunite with clay, an old friend from virginia who now lives in northern california.

virgina is for lovers!
(ben, clay, and i)

finally, it was time to call it a night and to slip into the bliss that was my bed!

sunday morning, i headed out a little early for the second choir practice.  the numbers had grown, and lo and behold, eventually, there was sheet music.  i think we sounded pretty good. and...we had the best seats in the house.  the chapel, overflow, and cultural hall were completely full. even the stage had filled seats.  the estimate was about 1400 people -- all of whom i watched for the duration of the meetings.  the main speaker was elder acosta of the seventy, and i enjoyed his message.

after sacrament, it was boxed lunches, then a fireside with guest speaker bishop causse, first counselor in the presiding bishopric.  if you are lds, the name might be more familiar to you as he just spoke at general conference last month.

he was an absolute delight. his accent is not hard on the ears, and i really appreciated that he spoke on a topic that was not TOO 'singles focused' but certainly had a number of apropos applications.

his talk focused on the story of the laborers in the vineyard, and he referred to a talk previously given by elder holland.  it resonated strongly with me, and i particularly appreciated this quote:

However late you think you are, however many chances you think you have missed, however many mistakes you feel you have made or talents you think you don’t have, or however far from home and family and God you feel you have traveled, I testify that you have not traveled beyond the reach of divine love. It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ’s Atonement shines.

all in all, it was a great way to close out what had turned out to be a great weekend!

december

as seems to happen more and more, december just seemed to slip away when i wasn't looking.

it started with the final planning and execution of my last event of the year -- our biannual all employee meeting.  with a few added elements, this was our most 'complicated' employee meeting yet, and, to add insult to injury, i was also tasked with presenting.

those who know me well know that speaking in front of people is my all-time greatest fear. it's a nausea inducing fear that i try to avoid at all costs.  not to mention that there were a thousand moving parts (usually by me) that had to be handled while i was supposed to be on the stage in front of my 500 co-workers.  

the good news is that it all went off without a hitch.  and, i even learned yesterday that in the post-event survey sent to employees, my presentation ranked the highest of the event.  while i'm pleased and grateful for the result, i'm mostly just glad it's over!

fortunately the first couple of weeks weren't all fear and nausea.  my friend vicki invited me to join her at a minor league hockey game, where i had my first 'up against the glass' experience.

and i joined my roommate and another friend in los angeles for las posadas on olvera street.  not only was this my first time using the metro here (i still can't believe there is one), but it was also an interesting educational experience.  the event commemorates the journey of mary and joseph from nazareth to bethlehem, and their search for shelter. there were pinatas, and nativities, and singing. and, there were churros.  i don't know that i would do it again, but it was a new an interesting experience.

only a couple of days after my big work event, i headed to savannah, georgia.  

in november, i received a job offer from a company based there.  the offer was completely unexpected and created a lot a lot of internal conflict.  on one hand, i would really like to be back east, closer to my family.  on the other, i just wasn't sure savannah would be a good fit for me.  

my long weekend there was a bit of a rough one (travel problems, terrible weather), but ultimately it confirmed what i had already begun to feel. the job would have been a good fit, as would most of the people. but the city...is great for being a tourist in, but not to live in. at least not for me.  

the decision was not an easy one, and it occupied the majority of my free-thinking time in november and early december.  but turning it down also made me realize that i'm not ready to leave california just yet.  and there is a certain peace in that.

only a few days after returning from georgia, i was back on the east coast.  only this time, it was to meet my brand new niece and spend the week with my family.  

usually my visits home involve a lot of going and seeing. visiting with old friends, undertaking various activities.  this trip though, we all just kind of hunkered down and spent the week with each other. and it was perfectly lovely.

it nearly kills me to have say goodbye each time, and i still wish i could snuggle in with the new baby, but i was back just before new year's to celebrate in california for the first time.  

despite my reservations, i opted for the big local mid-singles celebration. and, while i have nothing exciting to report, it was an enjoyable evening spent with friends, which is really all i could ask for. 

back at work now i'm trying to get up to full speed preparing for my biggest conference of the year, while managing a nasty sinus infection.  

at this rate i have a feeling that my next post will appear in february and i'll be talking about how quickly january flew by.  seems to just be the way things go these days!

the haunted circus

i was excited to be heading back to texas.  i love texas. i'm a lot more country than i think i've previously realized.  but i was also excited because i'd finally be in the right texas town at the right time, to meet up with my friend old virginia friend, stephanie.  to clarify, she's not old, i'm not old, but our friendship is old. old like a fine wine that just gets better with time.

so, i had a lot to look forward to, and when i got a text from a relatively new co-worker asking if i'd be up for a haunted house while we were in texas, the ante got upped!

the decision was made to visit the strangling brothers haunted circus.  i'd like to tell you that i selected it because it appeared on 'top haunt' lists, or that i am particularly terrified of clowns, but really, i selected it because it was the ONLY option on a monday night.  which makes it a happy accident that it is hands down the scariest haunt i've experienced!

since i'm not especially bothered by clowns, i expected it to be 'okay', but it was beyond memorable.  being there on a monday night meant very short lines.  which should have moved faster.  but when i realized why it was slow going, i forgave the delay.  it turns out that they were staggering each group so that you were only going through with the people you came with. that alone made it stand apart.  i hate being lumped in with a larger group and depending on where you are in that larger group, you may actually see everything coming before it comes.  this was not the case at the circus.

also setting it apart was that rather than being set in some kind of building, in line with it's circus theme, it was actually roughly 30 big-rig size trailers linked together in some case and with some outdoor scenes happening between every 3 or 4 trailers.  this was also most excellent for me as i tend to get very hot in haunted houses and the outdoor vignettes gave my body a chance to regulate it's temperature.

but even beyond these seemingly subtle differences, the quality of the scares was far above average.  while not every 'scene' made me react, there was literally something for everyone. in fact, it was this experience that made me realize that my quirky 'cabin fever' --the one that would make me go driving around the neighborhood in three feet of snow, just to know that i could,  is actually a fear on some level.

there was one area in particular that tapped into the fear.  dense with white fog and populated with people wearing white masks and white clothing so that you could not see them until they were inches from your face, it was also impossible to find a way out.  we were in that trailer for probably 6 or 7 minutes, at least two of which, i spent curled up in a standing ball in a corner. our exit was finally made possible by one of the whiteys with a finger point, and i'm not sure we would have found it without the help.  we couldn't even figure out where we had come from!  it was soooo good!

i recently read a review on yelp where the reviewer, referring to some haunt or another, said he considered a haunt a good value if you got at least a minute for every dollar you spent.  we spent 25 dollars and it took a little over 45 minutes for us to go through the entire experience, never running into or being bumped into by any other participants.  they were truly excellent minutes.

and the texas fun was not over.  the following evening gave me a chance to spend a few hours with stephanie.  she had picked fred's texas cafe, a ddd joint that, it turned out, i hadn't been to. we grubbed and gabbed, and i was reminded just how much i love seeing old friends. i love that they come with a shared built in history.  i love that you share certain understandings and don't have to cover old ground, but can go on the same nostalgia trip should you so choose. and i love that you can just pick up where you left off.

needless to say it was a most excellent tuesday night in texas.

east coast swing, the final movement

with kendyl set to head off to her dad's, i got up early on day 5 to make sure i had some time with the girls -- particularly since they had already complained that they weren't getting to see enough of me.  so we spent the morning goofing off, dressing up, taking photos, and doing lots of giggling and snuggling.  eventually and sadly, the time came to say goodbye to kendyl, and then it was time to get our sightseeing for the day.

day 5 was a day that matt had been eagerly awaiting.  time for our journey into the nation's capital.  i still believe the washington metro is one of THE finest public transportation systems anywhere, so of course, i opted to take advantage of that rather than driving in. it was another first for my friend and we rode in washingtonian style, ear buds in, listening to our audio book.

when we arrived in the city we had two objectives; the air and space museum, and anything else we could fit in after that. and that's exactly how it worked out. i can't say that i have ever spent as many hours in a single museum as i did that day, but i was happy to indulge my companion since he was the impetus for the trip, and the reason i got to see my friends and fam on the right coast.

we closed down the museum and headed out for our walking tour of the monuments.  this was semi-strategic as there are several monuments i prefer at night. i had forgotten that the washington monument was under renovation post-2012 earthquake. fully under scaffolding, the monument took on a completely different look and we snapped a few pics before heading on to the vietnam, lincoln, finishing off with two of my favorites, the korean and the world war 2.

the rain held off and the cool temps were a blessing.  we made our way home and found ourselves awake 'til the wee hours of the morning chatting and looking at photos and finishing 'the maze runner' (which, btw, was underwhelming).

day 6. our final day.  and more aerospace on the agenda. after getting a nice and proper sleep-in morning, we got ready and headed to the udvar-hazy center - the air and space extension built near dulles airport.  this place will always be special to me as i planned a large companyevent there in my former (pre-california) life. and it seemed to resonate with matt as well.  the sr-71 blackbird and space shuttle discovery can't help but be impressive, but it's more than that.  there's just something about the collection and the staging in an enormous airplane hangar that sets it apart from other museums.

the bonus for me was that my friend anne and her husband (and baby adele) had recently landed in the area after doing their 'welcome back to the us' tour, and joined us for an afternoon stroll through the museum. adele was darling and reminded me a little of my niece with the same name. talk talk talk and all smiles.  and apparently the snuggles and kisses she gave me are an extremely rare commodity!

anne and brian departed a little early (so excited i will now get to see them when i'm visiting my folks!), and matt and i finished perusing the various avionic displays before finally heading to the airport where i dropped him off to catch his flight back to california.  since i would be heading on to kansas city for  work, we gave the trip a good review and said our farewells.

all in all, it was a pretty perfect road trip. the timing and activities worked out as hoped for or better, and  i could not have asked for a more perfect traveling companion. my sometimes-crush will remain my sometimes-crush (and only that... i asked), i'm grateful to have had a chance to spend some time with some of my favorite people, and i'm excited to have discovered a kindred spirit in california.

east coast swing, second movement

day 3 arrived and not only were we still speaking to each other, we were still laughing and telling stories and enjoying our audio book.  the plan for the day was a leisurely one.  we'd be making our way up to my folks in northern virginia, but we'd me making a pit stop at the other willises (brinn and fw) for a birthday party.

since that pit stop would already alter our normal driving route, and i knew the likelihood of my being in greensboro, nc again in the near future was slim to none, we may have gone just a little further out of our way to visit the guilford courthouse national park. what was most interesting to me is that it was a revolutionary war site.  most of the historic sites i grew up visiting were civil war, so it was a nice change of pace.

the rain made a full exploration a non-option (which matt probably appreciated), but we followed the driving tour and made a few quick photo stops.  it did not, however, diminish our need for food.  and this is where greensboro, nc became one of my favorite places EVER!  thanks to yelp, we went hunting for the big burger spot.  it took a couple of tries, some alternating sweet and stern talking to the gps, and an absolute refusal to be thwarted, but it turns out this tiny, tucked-in-next-to-a-gas-station burger joint was a hole in the wall to match all other holes-in-walls.  i mean, they have a french fry menu (in addition to their burger menu), and this would easily fall in my top 5 burger/fries nationwide.

time to get a move on though, so onward we went to buena vista, va, where we re-joined colby and julie at brinn and fw's home for georgie's birthday carnival.  fw's mad building skills coupled with brinn's mad creativity were on full display, and even though our morning activities made us a little late, we still enjoyed some chicken-catching, funnel cake, and good company.

after getting our fill of some experimental shaved ice flavors, making plans to see the willises at christmas, and bidding adieu, we continued on to ashburn.  our late arrival ensured that most of the family was already asleep, so i got matt settled in and we called it a night.

day 4 dawned with some new realizations.  the first was that we weren't seeing a lot of 'dawn' anymore. our later and later bedtimes made for later and later wake up calls. ah, finally, a vacation!  the second was that matt and i had survived three full days of continuous and close quarters, and we were still having a blast!  i wish i hadn't been so shocked by this, but i've lost friends as a result of traveling together, so i'm a little paranoid.  but our time on the road was somehow perfectly balanced by conversation, dashboard drumming, audiobook listening and critique, and site seeing.

with the impending doom--i mean, rain--i suggested we push our dc day to day 5 and opt for my last minute back-up plan.  he was curious and interested when i suggested luray caverns as a great 'inside activity', and after spending the waning morning hours with my darling nieces, back into the car we went!

another couple hours of good conversation and we were just outside front royal, va,  visiting the fourth largest cave system in the country.  though i have visited many times, it never fails to impress, and matt repeatedly praised both my idea and the caverns themselves.  it also provided him some phenomenal opportunities to play with his new camera.  so much so that we ended up in three different tour groups.  apparently we were having too much fun and continually found ourselves at the back of one group as the front of the next was coming up behind us.  we did ultimately find a synergistic group with some kindred spirits - which made taking non-self portrait photos a lot easier! ;)

after returning to the surface, we made our way across the parking lot to the car and carriage museum that has never ceased to seem random and weird. but, admission is free and boys like cars, so i hung in there while my traveling companion perused the wood and chrome mobility machines.

a few photos and a few miles down the road later, matt asked me about the 'ice' place i'd mentioned.  i couldn't believe i'd almost forgotten but i was back in rita's territory.  i quickly referred to my rita's app, identified the most convenient location, called mom to let her know we'd be late for dinner (at which point she asked me to pick up a couple of pints), and spent the next hour on the road, mouth watering,praying for pineapple-coconut.

i was out of luck.  but fortunately there is always a good second choice at rita's. i teamed up with a store employee to educate matt on the art of ice and custard, and he made his selection.  i'm not sure it was quite the earth-shattering experience i had led him to believe it would be (and that my roommate and other friends have all enjoyed), but i'm sure that somehow it's his own fault.  regardless, i was satiated.

my family had opted to hold dinner for us, so when we arrived back at the homestead, we got to spend the rest of the evening enjoying their company.  it was one of those nights where no one left the kitchen table for hours, and i was so glad to be home.

east coast swing

when my friend, and sometimes crush, matt, said that he'd never been to the east coast and asked if i'd be willing to take a trip with him, i jumped at the opportunity.for one thing, you can learn a lot about someone when you road trip with them. and for another, visiting some of my closest friends and family? sign me up!

preparing for the trip was a breeze.  i was grateful that he trusted my many years of travel and planning experience, letting me dictate the flow and order of our week long vacation.  and given his professional and personal interest in aviation, i made sure there were plenty of 'flight' stops along the way.

day 1 had us meeting at 5am for our shuttle to lax. me at 5am is enough to send any man (or woman) running, as i can be a little grumpy that early.  maybe it was the adrenaline, but we pleasantly survived that first hurdle.  and after the six hour plane ride to raleigh, nc, we were still friends.  off to a good start!

we headed to julie and colby's for an evening in and enjoyed playing with the kiddos and catching up with the adults.  we were fortunate that it was overcast with temps in the low 70s (as it would be for the duration of the trip) so we spent much of the evening outdoors before calling it a night.

day 2 was 'day-trip' day, and maybe the day matt was most looking forward to.  he had suggested that a motorcycle might be a fun way to make the trip, but with the threat of rain, we opted to stick with the car, and made the 3 1/2 hour drive to the outer banks of north carolina to check out kitty hawk.  it's been 7 or 8 years since i had been there, and frankly, i hadn't remembered it that well.  we spent a few hours exploring the national park (guess who got a stamp?!) learning about the flight-brothers.  and once again, i was grateful for the cool temps since being outside on a normal nc summer day would have been painful!

despite those cool temps and on and off sprinkles, we made our way to the beach, where i was dying to get my toes back in the atlantic!  i had bragged about how warm it is (matt had never been in or even seen the atlantic before) and it wasn't long before we turned the car into an awkward changing room, had our suits on, and were wading into the ocean.

man, i miss that ocean.  granted, it was high tide and a bit rough due to the offshore storms, but warm enough to enjoy without a wet suit (take that pacific. yeah, i'm talking about you!).  we attempted to dry off a little before heading to dinner, enjoyed some grub, and began the journey back to raleigh where we spent another evening with the willises.

mother's day

sometimes the sacrifices of the road warrior life are balanced by the perks of the road warrior life, and being able to spend mother's day with my mother (and father, sister, brother-in-law, and nieces) was a definite perk!

though our time was short (about 18 hours) it was packed full of chill family time -- something i never get enough of.

january 1

my visit home to virginia for the holidays was filled with family, friends, food, music, movies, SLEEP...and even a little romance that has potential (fingers crossed!) for big romance.

it was, all in all, just about as perfect as a week can get, but this photo, for me, sums it up.