the midsingles conference

the kayak crew

every year several hundred mormon midsingles (singles in roughly the 27-45 age range) converge on my former hometown of huntington beach for a weekend of activities, workshops, and mingling. and every year i look forward to it with dread.

i always feel like i should participate, particularly  since it's in my back yard, and people come (literally) from all over the world to attend.  but i've learned about myself that i don't do well in large groups, so it is an anxiety ridden 72 hours for me.  so much so that i've skipped out on it for the last couple of years.

this year, though, the schedule was much more appealing...i even begged off a work trip in order to attend.  maybe it's the sentimentality of knowing that it will probably be my last, or maybe it's just that it seemed organized in such a way as to create smaller (better) group interactions, but i found myself looking forward to it this year for the first time...ever.

the festivities started on friday, but as i was traveling home from a work event in houston, i missed day one.  i finally arrived home on friday night/saturday morning at about 1am after flight delays and local traffic jams, and i knew saturday morning would come way too fast.  in fact, i wasn't 100% committed to attending the morning workshops, but i would try.

when the alarm went off, i decided to get up, move around a bit,  and see how i felt.  i felt okay. not awesome.  definitely in need of more sleep.  but okay enough to suck it up and participate. so i did.  jamie and i headed to huntington, and though we were on time, we found seats near the middle of the cultural hall overflow.

clint and tara's kayak selfie

the first workshop speaker was probably fine, but i was so tired, and his voice so constant, that it was a struggle to stay awake. after he concluded, we moved up to cushier seats for the highlighted speaker, sister kristen oaks (wife of apostle dallin oaks).  she was much easier to stay awake for! she was charming and engaging and funny and self-deprecating -- a real pleasure to listen to.

when she concluded, we grabbed our bagged lunches, found our friends, and spent the lunch hour chatting and catching up.  i had decided that, since my travel makes it hard for me to participate in any normal choir,  i would also participate in the choir practice that would take place at the latter half of the lunch break, and would sing in the sunday meetings the following day.

the aquarium after dark

it was there that i met my new friend clint. he'd come from yuma, az and we were insta bffs for the day.  choir practice was rough on all of us as they had only about six copies of the music for 40 people, but we were promised there would be enough music at the sunday practice.

during this time i was debating about whether or not i was going to participate in the afternoon kayaking that i had signed up for.  i had actually registered for that before registering for the conference. i loved the idea of the smaller group, and an alternative to just laying around on the beach feeling judgy and self-conscious.  but i was TIRED! and, for a californian, it was a bit chilly.

again, and contrary to my nature, i decided to suck it up.  jami was asked to be our group leader so i was able to beg her not to be too hard on my tired body.:)  when we arrived and everyone started checking in, i discovered that my new bff, clint, was also in the group, and when we were told to pair off, he asked if we could be partners.

jenn, kristina, larysa, and i

we spent the next couple of hours getting to know each other and the others in our group, while enjoying what turned out to be a beautiful sunny afternoon, weaving in and around newport harbor.  despite my exhaustion, i was really glad i had decided to go through with it.

i was planning on getting in a power nap between kayaking and the evening activity, but the timing just didn't work.  so, i powered through.  the dinner/dance was being held at the long beach aqauarium (which i love!), so i knew that even if the social aspect was a bust, that i would really enjoy the setting.  and it truly was amazing.  being there as a private group, after hours, was very very cool.  and it also afforded the opportunity to spend some time with my girls, catch up with my friend ben, and reunite with clay, an old friend from virginia who now lives in northern california.

virgina is for lovers!
(ben, clay, and i)

finally, it was time to call it a night and to slip into the bliss that was my bed!

sunday morning, i headed out a little early for the second choir practice.  the numbers had grown, and lo and behold, eventually, there was sheet music.  i think we sounded pretty good. and...we had the best seats in the house.  the chapel, overflow, and cultural hall were completely full. even the stage had filled seats.  the estimate was about 1400 people -- all of whom i watched for the duration of the meetings.  the main speaker was elder acosta of the seventy, and i enjoyed his message.

after sacrament, it was boxed lunches, then a fireside with guest speaker bishop causse, first counselor in the presiding bishopric.  if you are lds, the name might be more familiar to you as he just spoke at general conference last month.

he was an absolute delight. his accent is not hard on the ears, and i really appreciated that he spoke on a topic that was not TOO 'singles focused' but certainly had a number of apropos applications.

his talk focused on the story of the laborers in the vineyard, and he referred to a talk previously given by elder holland.  it resonated strongly with me, and i particularly appreciated this quote:

However late you think you are, however many chances you think you have missed, however many mistakes you feel you have made or talents you think you don’t have, or however far from home and family and God you feel you have traveled, I testify that you have not traveled beyond the reach of divine love. It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ’s Atonement shines.

all in all, it was a great way to close out what had turned out to be a great weekend!

happy halloween!

halloween in california is the awesomest. seriously. the best.  maybe it's an overcompensation for lacking real seasons, but the variety of october holiday experiences are diverse and numerous -- and i've been taking advantage all month.

the celebrations continued on saturday evening with a church sponsored mid-singles dance/awkward social experiment up in los angeles.  the truth is, i really shouldn't have gone.  i was exhausted from my late night pool adventures and my early morning flight, but i get to be in town for these things so rarely that i felt like i had to go.  unfortunately as a result, i went with a bad attitude and a low tolerance for the 'awkward social experiment' portions of the evening.  i can't imagine that my company was remotely enjoyable, so i'm grateful that my companions were not only people i genuinely enjoy, but also ones who were very patient with me.

nicole, matt, jami, me, and rick

and on the upside, i was happy with my (red riding hood) costume, for the first time in years!

luckily, i had a chance to redeem myself on all hallow's eve.

a friend from church had organized a group outing with various stops throughout the evening.

jami and i headed to john's (the organizer extraordinaire) house to see if anyone else needed a lift, and filled the car before heading off to stop 1: the earrywood haunted house.

the local haunted house celebrated it's 10th anniversary this year, and this was my second visit (my first, a couple of years ago). i love that this free haunt is a truly home-crafted affair created for the sheer love of the holiday, and of scaring people, and that it is a really good haunted house!

during our wait, the group expanded from a dozen or so to 30 or 40 people,  we used the time to catch up with old friends and make new ones.

when our time came to enter the maze, rick, emily (a new introduction), and i headed in.  much to my chagrin, i brought up the rear of our trio, so of course i quickly became the obvious target.  so much so that one of the 'characters'  followed me through the entire maze, periodically popping up out of nowhere to remind me that he was there.  i got a few genuine scares and screams from the experience and managed to make it out alive!

i waited for jami and the rest of my car, who had somehow ended up at the back of the line, before we headed out to stop number 2: dr. tony's halloween extravaganza

this was a new, and totally amazing experience for me.  all i knew going into it was that we were going to some kind of halloween block party, but i learned later that the event originated from a local brain surgeon who loves the holiday and happens to own a few investment properties in the same neighborhood.  so, every year, he picks a theme, foots the bill for and enlists the aid of his tenants and other neighbors for a neighborhood-wide halloween celebration.

my initial reaction was surprise at just how many people were wandering the streets participating in the festivities.  i also found it very exciting that there was a halloween activity that somehow blended children and adults, costumes and 'street' clothes, trick-or-treating, and party, seamlessly. 

the crowd, though large, was remarkably tame, friendly, and diverse.  it felt so different from previous halloweens in virginia.  i've been a little east-coast homesick lately, but october has given me a chance to remember some of the things that make california special, and the block party was the icing.

this year's theme was the wizard of oz, and after joining up with a couple of other cars, we began following dorothy's journey from kansas to oz and back again.  criss-crossing the street from top to bottom, each house held a piece of the story.  we started on the farm (complete with actual tractor) with dorothy singing about a rainbow and slowly made our way through the rest of the tale.

we saw dorothys at most of the houses, each one at a different place in the story.  we met glinda, the tin man, scarecrow, cowardly lion, and of course, the wicked witch, time and time again. we lost our friends and found them, and lost them again.  we avoided a tornado, sang with munchkins, traveled to the emerald city (complete with giant animatronic 'wizard'), met more friends, waved off a hot air balloon and called it a most excellent night.

(last) weekend update

every year my ward hosts what has become the largest mid-singles conference...anywhere.  when i first joined the ward a few years ago, i was asked to co-chair the event, and have not attended since.  my excuse is that i have been out of town for work or other prior commitments, but for the sake of full disclosure, it's been a relief to have an 'out'.

ben h & i -reunited

it may be an age thing or a tolerance thing, but my dislike of large social events has increased exponentially in the last several years. give me a dinner or activity with 3-10 people and i am happy to socialize.  any more than that and my comfort level plummets.  i think people behave differently in larger groups, and i just don't like it!  conversations are superficial, eyes wander, engagement suffers.  and here's where the lack of tolerance comes in. 

ben b & i - also reunited!

in my mind, it serves no purpose to invest in someone with whom the conversation will be superficial, the eyes will be wandering, and the engagement will be questionable. rather, if i am going to spend valuable time getting to know someone new, i want to believe there is a possibility that we will give each other a chance to be real...maybe not immediately disclosing our lifetimes of hopes and dreams, but at least getting past the 'where are you from?" question, and assessing whether there is any sort of foundation for building a friendship.

my new friend rod & my old friend jamie

so, when i started feeling like i should attend this year's conference, i also started fighting that feeling.  and i had an excuse. i had a work event.  i couldn't do it.  then i was asked to be on one of the planning committees, and i was happy to be of service--particularly since my travel often prohibits it.  and then, i realized, while working with some fabulous people that i hadn't known very well before, just how disconnected my travel schedule had made me.  and all of the sudden i stopped fighting the feeling that i should attend, and embraced it.

jamie, pete, and i

of course, it meant jumping through a lot of hoops to get my work event handled, and a very early flight out this morning to be in orlando by the time the event actually begins, but, i felt good about that.  ...then i started developing expectations.  i mean, if i was having to do some massive maneuvering to attend this thing, it better be worth it. right?

it took me a full two weeks beforehand to get my attitude adjusted. and, ultimately i decided that i wasn't going to let the possibility of meeting a guy or not meeting a guy determine the success or failure of the experience.  i would consider it a success if i had a good time.  

perfect day for some sunshine - with nicole

even that was slightly questionable however, and with some trepidation, i joined my friend jamie, and her friend kirsten for the opening friday night activities at a local bowling alley.

though i was highly doubtful that i would actually have any fun at this event, i was quickly proven wrong, when, from my anti-social-suck-on-a-soda perch, i saw an old virginia friend walk through the door.

in the hot air balloon at great park, irvine

one of many things i've learned over the last five years, is that as much as i appreciate california's perks and pleasures, i'm still really 'east coast'.  i don't know exactly what it means or how to explain it, but i know it makes me different from the west coast people.  i've struggled to find meaningful friendships here as a result (and forget dating a local!), and on the few occasions i have met someone with whom i instantly 'click', they have been from the east. so you can imagine how excited i was to see an east coast friend! and he wasn't the only one.  ben b. was also in town for the conference, and between the two of them, i felt like i had a little of my old home in my new home for a full 48 hours, and it was WONDERFUL!

after that, i had the weekend in the bag.  i enjoyed making new friends, getting back on my beach cruiser for the first time since my knee surgery, spending my first afternoon at the beach in almost as long, and just generally enjoying the positive energy of a weekend at home!

a perfect southern california weekend

what can i say, i think this whole knee thing isn't so bad as it could be.  don't get me wrong, i'm a little nervous about the surgery...particularly as i have spoken to a couple of people in the last week who've had the same surgery and they were on crutches for 6-8 weeks post-surgery.  as i've since learned, if the meniscus can repaired, i shouldn't have that problem, but only 10% of it can be repaired. if it can't be repaired, it will have to be removed, and if it's removed, i can count on a lot of crutch time.

september is one of my busiest event months.  i'm scheduled to be in four different cities next month, so i'm not sure how that's all gone work, but one step at a time.

in the meantime, i'm feeling more like myself than i have in ages.  thanks to the knee, i've been home for the longest uninterrupted period of time since i started this job.  there's something about being home and having the ability to decide how i spend my time that makes me feel like ME again!

this weekend i exercised my freedom by taking advantage of two great southern california staples.  first up, the orange county fair!

spreading the xshot love. alison wanted to try hers out, but i think i got the better pic.

my friend alison and i have been planning our date for months, and as i don't get to see her very often, i was excited to relive our fair experience from years past.  i also invited my roommates along, and our friend greg joined us after the styx concert.

the only plan for the evening was food.

i starved myself for days in anticipation of this event.  okay..maybe only a couple of hours, but still, there was plenty of room for the old favorites. onion rings, corn, funnel cake, and ice cream.  we added some new twists, including bavarian cream on the funnel cake, and me convincing alison that mayonnaise on corn is YUMMY!  she was a skeptic but acquiesced to a bite or two, and she was hooked.

in between our food stops, of which, there were many, we enjoyed some of the arts and crafts - particularly the photography - and thoroughly enjoyed our visit to the ice museum.

the ice museum was inside a freezer, and the walls were made of ice bricks.  among the displays were an ice 'david', and a few other ice sculptures, including 'the thinker.'  we were all grateful for the blankets we were given, as it was a balmy 20 degrees inside the freezer.  and we enjoyed it so much that we made sure to take greg through after he had joined us.

we called it a night after we had stuffed and frozen ourselves silly.  not sure how i lasted so long, but i'm going to chalk it up to the vicodin.

the following morning, after running a few errands, heather and i headed down to the beach.

the ward beach party was being held that evening, but we wanted to spend some daylight enjoying the beautiful southern california weather.  for better or worse, the us open surfing championship, held every year in huntington beach, was also taking place.  it made for a festive environment, but the parking was horrendous.

heather dropped me off close to the ward party location, so i wouldn't have to walk too far, but she ended up having to walk a pretty significant distance after finding a spot for the car.   i found the few ward members saving our location and fire pits pretty easily, and enjoyed the bonding time with a couple of girls in the ward i don't know very well.

i got some reading and relaxing done , and slowly towards the late afternoon, other members of the ward began arriving.  i was sung to by a guy with great abs (photo below) watched and laughed at the semblance of a volleyball game, enjoyed a couple of ears from the saltwater corn roast, got to see a long and got to mingle with my peeps.

i also learned the power of a woman.

i was having a conversation with this guy and commented that a man in a suit is far more handsome than in almost anything else.  today, as i was singing in sacrament meeting, i saw him at the back of the chapel...in a suit.  this may not sound momentous, but i've never seen this guy in a suit before. shirt, tie, slacks, but never a jacket.  and to my point, he looks as good or better in the suit than he does in those abs. ;)

friday

At about 8:30 this morning, having been beaten, and nearly scourged to death, Jesus and the crossbeam he has carried on his bloodied back are laid down on the ground at Golgotha and affixed to the upright. A nail goes through the right hand, through the left hand, through the right wrist, through the left wrist and through both feet. The cross is lifted up at 9 a.m.

It has been a terrible night for the Savior, and need not have been so except for his transcendent love for us. Having more power than any man who had ever lived, Jesus at any time not only had the power to end the torment and toss his tormenters aside, but he had perfect faith to heal himself in every moment. Imagine that. How would you resist freezing a staff or a whip in the air before it strikes you if you could do so? How could you not, given the enormous pain of each blow, immediately heal yourself as if it was never there? I believe this was a greater trial than any of the physical injuries -- to show such perfect restraint in acceptance of the injuries and pain in order to fulfill the plan of the Atonement. Given our own inbred compelling instincts for self-protection and survival, which he had as well, it is impossible to imagine what power it took not to easily use the power he had to remove himself from all of it.

In his last sleepless night, Jesus first went through the agony of Gethsemane, which Bruce McConkie says was three or four hours of prayer and torment. "O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me." But he was obedient to the plan of the Father that he had championed in pre-mortality: "Nevertheless, not as I will, but as thou wilt."

Judas the betrayer came with "a great multitude" and kissed Jesus, who was bound and taken to the palace of Caiaphas. During the "trial," they spit on his face as he spoke, "buffeted him" and hit him with the palms of their hands. At one point, they blindfolded him, mocking, and then hit him in the face challenging him to prophesy who had hit him. After judging him guilty of blasphemy, the Jewish penalty for which was death, the Jewish authorities needed permission to kill him -- so they maintained he had committed treason against the Roman state, for which the Roman authorities could put him to death.

About 6 this morning, he as taken to the Hall of Judgment in Antonia Fortress to appear before Pontius Pilate. After a short, courteous conversation and interrogatory, Pilate found no fault in him -- but could not release him because of the animus of the Jewish leaders.

Pilate sent him to a higher Roman authority who happened to be visiting Jerusalem at the time -- Herod. Jesus refused to speak to the wicked Herod, who sent him back to Pilate for further judgment.

Pilate again told the people he could find no fault with Jesus. Hoping a "lesser" punishment would appease the mob, he said: "I will therefore chastise him, and release him." To chastise was to scourge or whip.

Either in a public place, or in a dungeon-like scourging room, Jesus was tied to a post and whipped with a scourge called a flagrum whose cords ended in shards of glass, pottery or dumbbell-shaped balls of metal. This was a punishment of 39 whippings which was so brutal that prisoners often died from it. Not only was the Savior's strength so extraordinary that he survived, but he was able to stand upright soon after to be subjected to the Roman soldiers' favorite Game of Kings.

The "play" was to treat the prisoner like a king by putting a robe on him, giving him a staff and then, the painful part, affixing a crown of thorns to his head. Unlike the wreath or tiara of thorns depicted in most art, it was more like a cap or a basket of thorns which had been "invented" by Syrian mercenaries serving in the Roman legions -- who platted the crowns and then beat them upon the skull of the prisoner with rods.

Having stated he would release Jesus, Pilate relents because of the crowd and tries one last chance to free Jesus, pleading for his life with the crowd. They have a choice to free the murderer Barabbas or the innocent Jesus. They choose Barabbas, and Pilate washes his hands, sending the Savior to his death.

Despite all the terrible injuries, Jesus for a time was able to carry the 80- to 90-pound crossbeam of the cross for a ways after it was lashed to him. On the way to Golgotha, the place of the skull, he finally succumbed to his injuries and could go no further with the beam so a man named Simon was plucked from the crowd to carry it the rest of the way.

"And it was the third hour, and they crucified him." Jewish days began at 6 a.m., making the time the Savior was "lifted up" for us on the cross at 9 a.m. By the way, none of the accounts mention that he was nailed to the cross -- that is only revealed later when Thomas asks to see the prints of the nails in the hands and feet of the resurrected Savior.

Over his head on the cross is placed an "accusation" reading: "Jesus of Nazareth, The King of the Jews."

"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."

The soldiers cast lots for his garments.

One of the two thieves on crosses beside Jesus challenges his to save himself and them if he is Christ. The other, a penitent, rebukes his fellow thief and says that their reward is just, but Jesus has "done nothing amiss." Being a convert on the cross, and having faith in Jesus, the Savior promises him: "Today shalt thou be with me in paradise."

Looking down from the cross, Jesus connects John and his mother Mary for the rest of their lives. She is to be his mother and he is to be her son.

Beginning at noon, darkness falls upon the face of the land. From the "sixth hour ... unto the ninth hour," or from noon to 3 p.m., the darkness remains.

At 3 p.m., or "the ninth hour," the Savior's mortal life comes to an end. Before it does, he lets us know that his final torment was the withdrawal of Heavenly Father's spirit from His Only Begotten Son. "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?"

Thinking he is thirsty, one tormenter fills a sponge with vinegar as if it is water, "and gave him to drink, which fulfilled prophesy, as did so many things on this day.

At 3 p.m. or so, Jesus "cried with a loud voice, and gave up the ghost." The key words are "gave up," because Jesus had to allow himself to die -- to give his mortality up, which no man had the power to take from him. As he died, an earthquake struck Jerusalem, and the veil in the Temple, which was a heavy curtain weighing many hundreds of pounds, inexplicably tore in half.

A centurion on the scene is converted and bears testimony: "Truly this man was the Son of God."

Because the Jews had pleaded with Pilate that the legs of all three being crucified -- Jesus and the two thieves -- be broken so that they would die before Sabbath evening came, when they should not hang on crosses, the soldiers went to do so. Death by crucifixion was from asphyxiation, and could sometimes take days if the victims could push themselves up to catch a breath. Breaking their legs insured they could no longer do so, and would soon die. But Jesus was to be the pure Lamb of sacrifice, in whom no bones would be broken. The soldiers broke the legs of the thieves but, seeing that Jesus might have expired, they pierced him with a lance and both blood and water issued out. This confirmed that he was dead.

Joseph of Arimethea (sp?) asked Pilate for the Savior's body and received consent. He and others took Jesus from the cross, laid him in "a clean linen cloth," and place him "in his own new tomb, which he (Joseph) had hewn out in the rock: and he rolled a great stone to the door and departed."

Mary Magdalene and "the other Mary" grieved against the stone for a time. Jesus, the beloved Master, Teacher and Friend, was gone. Though they did not know it, he was already gone from the tomb on a mission to the spirit world and other parts of the earth.

thursday

So memorable and truly transcendent were the events of Thursday evening that none of the Gospel writers tell us what happened during the day -- what the Savior did, or what he taught at the Temple. Instead, they moveright to the Passover Feast.

Following the instruction of the Master, Peter and John located a furnished, large upper room in which they could celebrate the Passover when the hour was come. When there, he took bread "and brake it ... This is my body which is given for you: this do in remembrance of me. Likewise also the cup after supper, saying, This cup is the new testament in my blood, which is shed for you."

While non-Christians may think it is at least strange to have a Sacrament which symbolizes body and blood, it illustrates what is the true Gospel's greatest attribute: as the Gospel of Transformation. In pre-mortal life, the critical decision was whether the children of God would be divided forever or not. Satan said no. We said yes because it was Heavenly Father's plan, with the Savior as our champion and Michael as our general. If the Father could accept the loss of a third of his children in that war, in order that we would all have a chance for the most magnificent transformation of all, eternal life, then we would not spurn that gift and would take that chance ourselves to employ free agency and progress. Our spirits were transformed into a body, which will die, only to be resurrected purely as a spirit body for eternity. Our souls are transformed from dross to gold if we are obedient to the commandments. I believe that was the lesson of Jesus's first miracle of water-into-wine at the wedding, and his last major miracle raising Lazarus from the dead. Through the Savior and his Atonement, and depending on our obedience, we have the possibility for unimaginable transformation. Obedience to what? It's simple and is told in the last week. First in the two great commandments on which hung all the law, and finally in the synthesized, shortened version he gave at the Last Supper -- the new commandment, As I have loved you, love one another. If you love him, keep his commandments. If you keep his commandments, you will know joyful love, and you will know him. If you know him, you are with him. Forever.

It is for you students to continue to ponder for yourselves the first part of the Atonement in the Garden of Gethsemane, which was so great and terrible that an Angel was sent to help the Savior through it -- when his Apostles could not stay awake. The second part of the Atonement came with the crucifixion and mortal death, and subsequent resurrection. The greater suffering was in the Garden, and was as much a torment of the spirit as of his physical body, which sweated drops of blood. All sin passed through him; all disease and pain. He did this for you, and for me -- for everyone.

True and full conversion in the Gospel of Jesus Christ only comes with a testimony of the Atonement. The Savior instructed Peter, When thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren. Peter could not be fully converted at the point of the instruction, because the Atonement had not yet occurred. You and I are fortunate and blessed to live after that event, instead of having it foretold to us at some far-off date. But it means our responsibility is greater then those living in B.C., because we have his example, the newer greater commandments he elucidated, and the responsibility that the fact of the Atonement puts upon us. I believe we chose or fully accepted the "calling" to be in this important time together. I pray that we do not waste it.

wednesday

and christ's last week continues...

Silence.

Silence.

We have not a single word from the Gospels on what Jesus said on Wednesday, or what he did -- but it prompts thoughts about the value of silence and sometimes solitude that we often forget. Silence in our prayers to listen, silence at church to ponder, silence in our lives to regenerate. Beginning with his 40 days in the wilderness, the Savior showed us the pattern and value of spiritual silence and solitude -- not as a constant thing, as some Catholic orders of monks and nuns do, but as a rejuvenative enterprise.

There is no way to underestimate the value of occasional silence, of the pause, of the coda. In the world of art, it is one of the strongest tools. In reading poetry, it is pivotal. In sculpting, it is essential. In painting, it allows perspective. And so on. In classical music, it is often the signal that the crescendo is about to come -- and that's what we have here on Wednesday. Knowing what was coming on Thursday and Friday, did the Savior need to regroup? Did he need to offer final words and counsel to those he loved -- his mother Mary, Mary-Martha-Lazarus, Mary Magdalene, the apostles?

Did he convey deeper doctrine to the Apostles to embolden them for the mission ahead? Will it be in the third set of scriptures to come from the Lost Tribes? Do we already have some of what he said in the Book of Mormon?

Then again, it is all the Latter-day Saints can do to follow the commandments and doctrine we already have. Time and again, Joseph Smith showed spiritual restraint by not conveying all that he knew, because he didn't want us to be condemned for not following higher laws and truths he knew.

So ... my personal feeling is that Wednesday was a quieter day than the marvelous teaching Tuesday. The scriptures say that he "taught daily" at the Temple -- Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. But I believe that because Tuesday was so doctrinally significant at the Temple and later at the Mount of Olives, that he particularly needed all the lessons to sink in with the Apostles. With the people, like the master teacher he was, he probably used repetitions to let the lessons of Monday and Tuesday take hold.

Then, too, on Monday and Tuesday, he was challenged to debate by the Pharisees and their ilk intending to discredit him. But Tuesday night, the debate was over for them. They made final plans to kill him, using the betrayer Judas to bring him to them away from the crowd. The Savior well knew this, and must have appreciated Heavenly Father's love to probably give him some or most of Wednesday to gird up his loins and take a breath, a pause of peace, less than two days before the agony of the Atonement that has saved all of us for a time, and the best among us for eternal life...

tuesday

christ's last week continued, dad's retelling....

Whereas for Monday there were only a few verses, we have multiple chapters full of parables and teachings recorded from the Savior's last Tuesday -- one of the most amazing of which was to declare what two commandments encompass all others.

If you have time this Spring break without Seminary, I would urge you to read about his Tuesday for yourselves. Tuesday can be found in Matthew 21:20-46; all of chapters 22, 23, 24, 25 and 26: 1-5, and 14-16. It is also found in Mark 11:19-33, all of chapters 12 and 13, and 14: 1, and 10-11. The Luke version includes Chapter 20, and some of 21. In John, it is 12:20-43.

First, on the way from Bethany to Jerusalem, they stopped at the fig tree Jesus had cursed the day before. It had "withered away" and "dried up from the roots" in less than a day. He used this as an opportunity to teach the Apostles about faith, prayer and forgiveness. He explained that just as he had "removed" the tree from fruitful life, so too did the Apostles have power to "remove" a mountain. "All things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive." (Matt. 21:20-22; Mark 11:20-26)

When Jesus arrived at the Temple for his daily teaching, the "chief priests" asked him by what authority he taught. He used the popularity of John the Baptist with the people to stump the priests, who would not answer by what authority John was baptized. They would not say. "Neither tell I you by what authority I do these things."

In succession, he then taught the Parables of:
* The Two Sons
* The Wicked Husbandmen, and
* The Marriage of the King's Son.

Then he was asked about money -- whether "tribute" or taxes should be paid to the Roman ruler Caesar. (It's personally interesting to ponder this around the time of the April 15 tax deadline for all of us!) His famous answer was to render unto Caesar what was Caesar's (temporal, monetary system) and to God the things that are God's.

He was asked about Marriage and the Resurrection, which was already a growing religious "theory." Said the Son of Man, who would personally become the most powerful proof of resurrection at the end of the week: "God is not the God of the dead, but of the living." He sided foursquare, then, with the doctrine of resurrection by declaring that God was always a God of the living, whether on earth or in heaven, including those who were once on the earth in mortal life.

At this point, since he had stymied the questions of the Sadducees, the Pharisees decided to have a go at Jesus in debate. For once, I am very grateful for a lawyer who asked a question. "One of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, Master, which is the great commandment in the law?" He answered that there were two, loving the Lord your God with all your soul and with all your mind, and loving your neighbor as yourself. "On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."

Now, he turned the tables by asking them who they thought Christ would be the Son of. Since they called him (not knowing Jesus was the Christ) the Son of David, how could that be? "If David call him (Christ) Lord, how is he his son?" Pure doctrine is always this rational and logical.

At this point, the same Savior who threw out the merchants and moneychangers now warns against and condemns the Scribes and Pharisees for their opposition to true doctrine -- which takes up the entire Chapter 23 in Matthew. That we have it preserved might suggest that the same words are well applied to apostates, and may have given comfort (and voice) to Joseph Smith's righteous anger and anguish when he was beset upon by ex-church leaders and others who tried to debate, trick and "destroy" him.

After this repudiation, things quieted again, and we read about The Widow's Mite in Mark (12:41-44) and Luke (21:1-4). He was sitting near the "treasury" at the temple, or money offering box and watched as the wealthy cast abundant and noisy coins into the box -- publicly demonstrating their "worthiness" to eye and ear-witnesses. He did not denounce the tithing of the wealthy, however showy, to the public. Instead, after a widow put in a mere "two mites," which was greater in relation to her income than the offerings of the rich to theirs, he pulled "his disciples" or Apostles aside and instructed them that the widow had given all that she had, and this was greater in the eyes of God than what the rich had done. In this, he was giving critical PPI-type advice to the soon-to-be leaders of the church who would be taking in offerings themselves in future that they should greatly honor alms from the poor, even though it be less than from the rich.

It was after the Widow's Mite that scholars have placed another private discussion with the Apostles at the Temple, when Jesus lets them know about his coming death. Greeks who came to Passover asked Philip for an audience with Jesus, and it was at this point that he and Andrew report this to Jesus. "The hour is come that the Son of Man should be glorified." In John 12:20-36, he now talks about being "lifted up" in death soon. This conversation is overheard by others nearby, who begin asking questions. He speaks carefully, using the wonderful expression, "Yet a little while is the light (of his earthly life) with you." Then he follows this with a sermon on his relationship to the Father.

After this, John says, he "departed" by disappearing among the crowd and then out the city again. After he left, John reports the reaction of some people to these teachings who fail to understand, despite the many miracles Jesus had performed, and the perfect truth of his teachings, who the Savior truly is.

Now that the subject was raised, once he got outside the gates of the city, he and the Apostles stopped on the Mount of Olives, which was on the way to Bethany. At the bottom of the Mount is the Garden of Gethsemane. It is on this Tuesday evening that he offered the most-quoted and fullest discourse on the signs of the times (Matthew 24; Mark 13). "The disciples came to him privately (as) he sat upon the Mount of Olives" and asked him about the signs. His first mention of being "lifted up" in death soon at the end of the teachings at the Temple had naturally spawned the questions. He tells them about the signs of the destruction of the Temple and of his own second coming. He tells them the parable of the fig tree, which has been a "visual aid" on these first two days. He tells them the parable of the man taking a far journey, and that the Son of Man will come again like "a thief in the night."

It is as part of this discourse privately on Tuesday evening with his Apostles, sitting on the mountain where he will soon be betrayed (Garden of Gethsemane at the bottom), and the mountain on which he will stand and break in half at the Second Coming -- it is in this discourse that he appropriately reveals the Parable of the Ten Virgins -- which has everything to do with being prepared for the Second Coming. (Matt. 25:1-13)

He follows that with the equally powerful and important Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14-30).

He then reveals that it is he, Jesus, who is the Bridegroom and who will judge the world. (Matt. 25:31-46).

After he "finished all these sayings," he told them that in two days, during the Thursday evening feast of the Passover, "the Son of Man is betrayed to be crucified."

As he was speaking, the chief priests and scribes were conferring on how to kill Jesus, according to the Gospel writers. They were probably still stinging from his specific rebuke of them hours before so that even those who might have been more moderate could not speak up for saving his life (or ignoring him). As they tried to figure out how to do it, one of the Apostles, Judas Iscariot, arrives and says he will "deliver" Jesus to them. Did he know it was to deliver his own Savior and Rabbi to his death? The text is not clear. We'll not get into speculating on the motives of Judas. It is interesting that he either left early from the private teachings of Jesus about his death and Second Coming, or after that discussion was over and Jesus moved on to Bethany. The priests promised him 30 pieces of silver, which was the price of a slave, for betraying Jesus. Many, many years before, it was Judas's namesake -- Judah (since Judas is the Greek version of Judah) -- who came up with the plan to get rid of brother Joseph by selling him as a slave for the going price then. And yet ... in both the case of Joseph and Jesus (or Joshua, his true Hebrew name), while Judah and Judas sought to do evil, God turned it to good. It was only through these betrayals that, in Joseph's case, Israel was saved temporally and, in Jesus's case, we all may be saved with eternal life through the atonement.

Tuesday stands for us as the most important set of teachings prior to the Last Supper during the last week of the Savior's life.

monday

to celebrate the approach of easter, my dad has initiated a daily email to his sunday school class discussing what christ was doing on that same day some 2000 years ago.

this, is monday:

On Sunday, during his triumphal entry into Jerusalem, he was so delayed by the time he got to the Temple, that it was time to leave the city without, so far as we know, teaching. He stayed in Bethany, about two miles away, and probably at the house of his good friends -- Mary, Martha and their recently "arisen" brother Lazarus, whom Christ had brought back from the dead. Sunday was the only day he rode into Jerusalem on a mule -- which was to fulfill an Old Testament prophecy.

Monday is found in Matthew 21: 12-19; Mark 11: 12-18; and Luke 19: 45-48.

On Monday. as he walked to Jerusalem, he was hungry and saw a fig tree, but there were no figs on it. His disciples probably understood his disappointment, and the cursing of the tree, as related to other fig tree parables. To me, being a convert, it reminds me of one of the reasons I was attracted to the LDS church, and knew it was the true church -- "by their fruits ye shall know them." The LDS church was no barren or sparsely-blossomed fig tree, like so many other religions I had tasted -- it was full to overflowing of good fruit, and I am still savoring all the truths upon our tree.

When the Savior got to the Temple this time, he would not teach sacred truths without "cleaning" its outer courtyard first. "My house shall be called the house of prayer, but ye have made it a den of thieves." He cast out all the salesmen and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers before he taught. Some new agers types do not realize that the Savior eternally demonstrates, like his Father, the two "arms" of true doctrine -- a mighty arm of justice, and an equally mighty arm of mercy. That is how he is the God of the New AND Old Testament. That is how he can show his righteous fury in the Temple courtyard so that all the "den of thieves" flee before him, and moments later, heals "the blind and the lame (that) came to him in the temple."

Just as there had been a chorus of Hosannas on Palm Sunday -- his triumphal entry -- now it is a chorus of specifically children who "cry" in the Temple courtyard, "Hosanna to the Son of David." Their adulation of Christ, and declaration that he was the Messiah (as the Son of David) "displeased" the chief priests who urged him to silence them. The previous day, he had told the dissenters that if he silenced the crowd, the very rocks would cry out in exultation. At this point, he says that "perfect praise (comes) out of the mouth of babes ..."

Mark adds that the angry priests "sought how they might destroy him." In fact, the chief priests had been plotting to destroy Jesus since he had raised Lazarus from the dead. It was a miracle they could not dispute, and which most threatened their power and hold on the people. The scriptures say that "from that day forward" they sought to put him to death. Their resolve continues, then, Monday at the Temple when he tossed out all the merchants.

For safety, he returned the two miles to Bethany before the gates of the city of Jerusalem were closed.

-DVA

weekend at home = good for the soul

after taking advantage of a saturday morning at home to run some errands (which were oddly fulfilling) i headed to long beach to meet mihaela for crepes at la creperie, a delightful little place that my former roommate used to rave about, but one at which i'd not yet had the opportunity to try out. i indulged in both a savory and a sweet crepe, which were both delicious, but mostly i reveled in the being able to spend time with a friend. i hadn't seen mihaela in, literally, four months - thanks to my travel schedule, and it was so nice to feel like i was engaging in my own life again!

after crepes, i had just enough time to enjoy a catap before alison came over to see the new place and meet the dog. on the agenda for the evening was an la galaxy game.


i'm the first to admit that i'm not an avid soccer fan. that being said, since david beckham arrived here, i've been wanting to at least see one game. chalk it up to my affinity for the movie 'bend it like beckham' or just the fact that not everyone has an opportunity to see him play, either way, i was super excited.

the only annoying part of the evening was when security would not let me in with the big camera because they said it was 'too professional.' please people! i'm posting pic on facebook, not espn.com! we had to walk all the way back to the car to deposit the camera, and as we had parked in the very farthest lot to ensure a timely escape, it truly was a long walk!.


the game did not disappoint! beckham scored the first goal for the evening, and alison and i enjoyed getting caught up while watching the fancy footwork on the field. sadly, without my big cam and it's high speed shutter release, that fancy footwork was a little too fast, and most of my pics came out blurry. nonetheless, we certainly enjoyed the game and our time together.


today was stake conference, and it was wonderful! our stake has two singles wards and a midsingles ward, so the family wards met for the first session and the singles for the second. the beauty of this was that i have some friends in the other wards who i (again) haven't seen in months. and they were all in one place!

the speakers were all on point (which is rare in a two hour session), but every message was powerful and poignant (is that redundant?). and after i had been edified by the spirit, i had the opportunity to reunite with some of my favorite californians.

all in all, i really needed this weekend. it was the first time in a long time that i have felt really connected to the spirit and to my life. it has been extremely difficult traveling so much, and this weekend reminded me that i need to make more effort to stay connected and to be engaged.

a little giggle, a big guffaw

i don't usually comment on the state of being single and over 30 in the mormon world (at least not TOO often), but i got a good laugh today and felt compelled to share.  for those of you outside my faith, the single adult program consists of single mormons, age 31 to dead.  which is why those of us on the lower end of that range, who also happen to live in an area where there is a 'mid-singles' program (roughly 31 - 45), are very grateful.

 

there is an upcoming single adult conference about an hour from where i live, and the following workshops are being offered:

 

1. Scam Awareness
2. Dealing With Adversity
3. Understanding Assisted living
4. Storing Food For One
5. Spiritual Video Presentation
6. Finance and Credit

 

now, does one of these jump out at you, because #3 almost made me choke on my lunch!  sadly, i don't think the intention of this workshop is 'understanding assisted living for your elderly parents.'

kansas city: the church history tour

it's fair to say that i wasn't quite 'on' this trip. now that i've been back for two days and have spent both of them with a miserable cough, runny nose, and headache, i have a better understanding as to why--my body was getting ready to break down. i should be grateful it held off so long, but as i'm back on a plane on monday, all i can think about is how poor the timing is. oh well.

the exhibit setup was rougher than usual. the exhibit hall doesn't usually get air until the show starts, which is sometimes not an issue, and other times downright awful. i do thank my lucky stars that kc was experiencing unusually cool weather while there, but even in the high 70's with the high humidity that rain and thunderstorms brought, it was pretty uncomfortable. both myself and the install team were dripping with sweat. and that was how i spent my birthday:)

the install was supposed to finish up on thursday, but by day's end, there was still a few hours of work to be done. and 'a few hours' is not insignificant when it comes to an install. when you are contracted to pay for 6-8 hours of labor, that's pretty much what it should take. in this case, there was no one reason for the extra time, and i can't even entirely pinpoint it. maybe we were all moving slow in the humidity. there were certainly enough people - it just seemed to take forever.

that was compounded by learning on friday morning that my shipment of materials from our distribution center had been screwed up, and would not arrive until monday - the last day of the show. there was a lot of scrambling to try and figure out how to remedy the situation, and by early friday afternoon, with the booth finally set up, i was in desperate need of a brain break.

in a normal situation, that would have meant sleeping for hours in my hotel room, but on thursday evening, dad had pointed out that i was close to a lot of church history sites, so i decided to take advantage of having a rental car.

the first stop on the list was adam-ondi-ahman.


for those 5 of you readers who are not lds, you can google this or any of the places i'm going to mention, but i'm going to keep it pretty high level.

adam-ondi-ahman is, largely, a giant parcel of land. there isn't much to see other than grass and trees, but there was definitely a special feeling about the place. i must have hit this (and all the other sites) in an off time, because i was the sole visitor. the solitude, the quiet, and the spirit of the place provided an ideal setting for some reflection and introspection.

from adam-ondi-ahman, it was on to haun's mill, the site of the 1838 massacre. there is a good explanation of the events at huan's mill found here. and again, there isn't much to see. the haun's mill site is off the beaten path - literally. in doing my research, i couldn't find an actual address to plug in to the gps - just coordinates. those coordinates took me about 5 miles on a one way dirt and gravel road.

the former rlds church, now the community of christ, has placed a marker there, but truth be told, i never found it. instead, i found a field. the original memorial millstone now sits in breckenridge, mo, so there is no evidence of what took place here. only the knowing of it, which creates a profound reverence for the lives lost.

from haun's mill, it was on to far west:

In August 1836, W. W. Phelps and John, presidents of the Latter Day Saint Church, selected 1 square mile of land overlooking the rolling native prairie, as the site for a new town to be called Far West. Settlement of this and neighboring lands along Shoal Creek began immediately. Far West became the county seat of Caldwell County, a region set apart by the State especially for the Mormons. In Far West the Saints built some two hundred homes, several dry goods stores and groceries, half a dozen black smith shop, two hotels and a printing office. The city quickly expanded to four miles square, eventually becoming the home of as many as 5,000 inhabitants. Residents excavated and laid foundation stones for a temple for worship on the Public Square. They also erected a large school building on the Square for use as a courthouse, town hall and temporary church. By the fall of 1838, Far West was the hub of community activity extending throughout Caldwell- encompassing nearly 2,000 farms comprised of approximately 250,000 acres purchased from the Federal Government.

In October 1838 a Missouri army surrounded Far West. At the end of three days, the Prophet Joseph Smith and other Church leaders agreed to meet with militia leaders outside the city. However, instead of conducting talks, the militia leaders arrested and sentenced Joseph and the others to death by a firing squad. Brigadier General Alexander Doniphan refused the order, stating that it was illegal. Although their lives were saved at this time, Joseph and the other leaders were unjustly incarcerated for five months, suffering horrible conditions.

While the Church leaders were in jail, mobs continued to harass the Saints, eventually driving them out of the state despite an early winter. Church leaders Brigham Young, Heber C. Kimball, and John Taylor led 5,000 suffering Saints across Missouri into Illinois.

There were good times at Far West as well. While there, Joseph Smith received divine communications, recorded in Doctrine and Covenants section 115, that revealed that the Church's name should be The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Also revealed was the system for tithing Church members and the instruction that a temple should be built at Far West.

from far west it was on to liberty jail. a visitors center has been built around the jail, and the theme for the day - solitude- continued...at least initially. the missionaries gave an an overview of the history, at which point, we were joined by a road-tripping couple on their way home.

after the introduction, we were taken in to the main room, where the foundations of the jail and the recreated upper and lower rooms are. joseph smith was held in this jail for five months before being allowed to escape:

Incarcerated in Liberty Jail with Joseph Smith were other Church leaders: Hyrum Smith, Sidney Rigdon, Lyman Wight, Alexander McRae, and Caleb Baldwin. During the winter months in which they were held in the basement jail, they suffered from intense cold and exposure to the elements because of the small slits in the walls that served as windows. The men slept on dirty straw and suffered poisoning attempts and insults. However, Joseph's biggest grievance was not his own condition of imprisonment but the knowledge that the members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints were suffering untold anguish that he could not prevent.

liberty jail is often referred to as the 'prison-temple', as joseph smith had much time for meditation, reflection, and prayer. this ultimately resulted in sections 121 & 122 of the d&c. you can most definitely still feel a spirit in this place. and it was enhanced by the sister missionary's closing on her presentation, in which, she sang the hymn 'abide with me' in a clear and beautiful voice. it was a perfect example of how music can magnify the spirit. and a perfect finish to the day.

a couple days later, i hit the last stop on the church history tour, independence, mo. currently, there is no temple in independence, though the site was dedicated in 1831 by joseph smith. there is, however, a visitor center where you can learn more about the history of the churh in the area and that of the temple site itself. the visitors center currently has an exhibit on display called 'reflections of christ'. there are some powerful an interesting pieces on display. this was one of my favorites:

we so often see christ portrayed seriously and i love the expression on his face here. i didn't know the title of the piece at the time, but was struck by the joy and love evident on his face. the photograph, fittingly enough, is titled 'joy.'

there were a few other highlights as well, one of the 10 virgins, one of jesus walking on water. all in all, a truly beautiful, truly inspirational exhibit.

i grew up visiting places like palmyra and nauvoo - heck, that's what we did for youth conferences! maybe as a result of having such easy access to those places, i hadn't previously given much thought to visiting others. with my close proximity though, i couldn't miss these missouri sites, and there is something about just being there and seeing it firsthand. all those sunday school lessons and scriptures and stories take on a whole new light when you are standing in those holy places.

more pics here

christmas in california

my second christmas season in california, i'm finding, is significantly different from the first. i've mentioned before that it can be a stretch to feel the christmas spirit here, as lights strung on palm trees simply don't have the same effect as on trees that actually lose their leaves when the cold weather hits.

this year however due to my own efforts, the cooperation of mother nature, and the vocal talents of my family members, i am in the mood far more than last year.

the festivities begin early in the month with the community christmas celebration, held annually at mick and jenny's stake center. it's both a phenomenal display of creches and a musical delight. each night spanning the weekend a series of performances are held, and for the second time, i got to watch all of the d kids perform in their respective choirs.

an annual tradition

this year, there was an added bonus, as jenny was performing in a 'parable of the ten virgins' one act (for lack of a better description). though not technically christmas themed, it was extremely powerful. unfortunately jesse, who was visiting for the day got to see just how powerful it was for me, as i spent the last 15 minutes of the performance, and the 15 minutes following it's conclusion, weeping. oh yes. weeping. not the 'tear rolling down a cheek' action. full on weeping. poor guy.

before the weeping began

nonetheless, the month was ushered in with family, friends, and thoughts turned toward christ.

for the last two weeks, it has continued to feel like christmas as a result of actually having cold weather. while i recognize that my idea of cold weather is diferent than it used to be, i've whipped out the winter coats on more than one occasion, and that certainly helps!

i'm also grateful to actually have friends to celebrate with this year! by the time the 2007 christmas season rolled around, i had been here less than two months and had barely started attending the ward that would become my future home. i'm sure there were fun activities going on last year, i just didn't know what they were!

al and i

this year, those fun activities began with our fhe christmas party at the huntington yacht club. i had a great date for the event, who is not just any date. in fact i have known this date for many many years, and from virginia. many of you, my dear readers, will know him as well. he recently moved out to huntington from va, and i couldn't be more excited to have a familiar face from home.

matt and i

the dinner at the yacht club was excellent, the company better, but the highlight was the white elephant gift exchange, where i picked up (stole) a single girl's kit, ironically, created (unbeknownst to me) by one of my good california friends. it contained a handcrafted cd with all the songs a single girl needs, chocolate, and the '50 first dates' dvd. i couldn't resist that steal! (photos here)

the festivities peaked this weekend, first with the balboa boat parade. the parade is an annual tradition (100 years this year) which i've just discovered, and the new york times has ranked it among the top 10 holiday events in the country.

getting ready for the parade

thanks to a girl in my ward whose office sits right on the water where the parade passes, we had the perfect viewpoint with easy parking and no crowds. we turned the conference room into party central, and had the food to prove it! we ordered pizza and enjoyed eachother's company while waiting for the boats to reach us, at which point, a few of us headed out to the dock, while the rest of the group remained on the balcony of the office to watch (wimps!).

enjoying the boats

the boats ranged in size from dingy to 'wow! they MAKE boats that big?!' yachts, and the decorations were equally diverse. we saw simple strands of lights, and elaborate christmas scenes. some boats blasted music, some passed quietly by, but nearly all had a shout of 'merry christmas' for those watching from shore. (photos here)



the light festival continued last night, on a visit to naples. though i really wish i was talking about italy, naples, is in fact an island community in long beach. this is the first time i had ever heard of it, but it is named as a result of its similarity to the 'real' naples, with houses lining canals, and yes, even gondoliers. as i learned last night, the residents of naples put on an extraordinary light show each year, complete with awards and prizes.

me and the girls

we wandered the canals, enjoying the sights, the energy, cups of hot cocoa, and the amaaaazing homes! (photos here)

this random stranger could not resist the allure of 5 beautiful women,
he simply had to be near us.

the christmas season lives on, and on christmas eve i'll be boarding a plane for virginia. i'm sure the airport madness will help me maintain goodwill toward men. or not!