weekend update

friday afternoon, my co-worker and i headed to the brand new whole foods near our offices for lunch (blessed be!).

it was a cornucopia of yumminess, and i had a hard time deciding. eventually, i asked for a stuffed pepper, and the counter slaves could not find the price, so they gave it to me as a sample. as the guy handed me my pepper, he said ‘that’s on us honey. just come back and tell us what you think.’

i found it amusing because strangers often use terms of endearment for me. i am almost never maam or miss, but almost always honey, sweetie, or darlin’. i can be with women, men, by myself--it doesn't matter. i don’t know what it is about me that elicits that response, but it is too common to deny. on one hand, it’s endearing. on the other, a little creepy.

friday evening was an altogether different experience.

i haven't been in a bar in probably four years or so. it's not that i am uncomfortable with the environment, but the last time i was in one, i was with several girlfriends. every one of them got hit on, except me. now granted, the average height of the guys at this place was 5'7", and with three inch heels, my 6'0" self wasn't exactly screaming 'hey, i'm approachable.' yet, it was enough of an ego blow that i have completely avoided the scene.

so here i am on a friday night, and i've got to go to a bar for work. yes, i realize tht sounds strange, but there was a band playing, and the band wants to play at our big event in april. this was the best opportunity to audition them. thank heavens anne was able to go last minute, because i had completely forgotten about it, and was terrified to go alone.

so, with my wing-girl locked in, we headed to the club/pool hall/bar. anne and i were both a little out of our element, and it wasn't long before a timid girl approached us. thinking, based on the location of the joint, that she could very well be someone i knew from my past, i was curious as to what she had to say. 'hi. this is so embarassing, but my friends think that you are cute and want to buy you a drink. are you single?'

i was taken completely off guard. granted, i sometimes get picked up in very strange locations, ie, gas stations, or even weirder yet, from moving cars (twice now, i have had guys write down their phone numbers and hold it up to their windows as they passed by me in their vehicles), yet it had never occurred to me that someone might try to pick me up in a bar. clearly, i am out of practice. my first response was the honest one. we're single. then running through my head was 'doh!, why did i tell her that? now what are we going to do?' so i tried to recover. 'all i'm drinking is diet coke. tell them we're mormon, and we're no fun.'

admittedly, not my best work. and i immediately thought 'oh crap. men love a challenge,' as this girl simultaneously said 'oh, i don't know, men like a challenge!'

not sure where to go from there i just asked her to tell them thank you, but not interested, which is probably what i should have started with. she told us to take a look around, and if we saw anything we liked to change our minds, to let her know. we didn't.

we stayed for another half hour or so before i felt like i had seen enough to make a decision and we were off.

saturday was a completely lazy day. i think i hate being single most on saturdays (or valentine's days or birthdays, or other holidays, but there are a lot more saturdays). my longest relationship ever lasted four years, and i remember that when he and i were dating, saturdays were crammed full of too many things to do, and not enough time. saturday mornings, were always spent at the ballpark with his 7 year old--baseball, football, or basketball, depending on the season. after that, there were always a million things to get done. there was never a quiet moment.

now it seems like saturdays are completely lifeless. i tend to get most of my 'must dos' done during the week..the cleaning, the laundry, etc. probably a result of my circadian cycle. so by the time saturday comes, i am bored to tears. a lazy saturday is a great thing once in awhile, but when every saturday is a lazy day, it gets old fast. i end up feeling like i have put my weekend to no good productive purpose. i used to volunteer on saturdays, but i was out of town on enough weekends, that it just didn't work with the type of program i was involved in. that had at least made me feel like i was doing something. however, the continued frequency of travel is preventative of trying that again.

all that to say, saturday was booo-ring. i went through the three netflix movies i had, and that's pretty much it.

by the time i came out of church on sunday, snow was already accumulating and the driving already a bit dicey. it was the first snow in our unseasonably warm winter, and i was in heaven.

i've been eagerly anticipating this first snowfall, and i think it no coincidence that our first real snow came on the 21st--my favorite day of the month. i think it was god's way of saying 'just for you, tara!'

and it was appreciated. i love the way the snow muffles the harshness of the world. the sounds of cars and people are diminished, and the silence brings a peace rarely found in today’s world.

i have severe issues with cabin fever, though, and the minute i find out or determine i can't or shouldn't get in my car and go somewhere, i am dying to get out. the roads in my neighborhood were fairly treacherous for a time, and i was trying to do the smart thing and avoid driving. so, in order to combat my need to get out, i took the dog for a walk. actually, several walks.

the feel of the cool bite of winter was incredible. it was a perfect night, windless, chilly, and the world to myself, if only for a few moments.

i was impressed this morning that the roads were mostly clear and safely passable, and even more impressed that drivers were being far more cautious then i am used to them being here.

i arrived at my office earlier than usual to prepare for a meeting, and as i walked toward the building, it seemed that all of the inhabitants were actually leaving it. fire drill. we huddled in the cold until we were finally allowed in, and i got my arse in gear for the first time in weeks.

i am the kind of person who works better with a tight deadline. i am more productive and have no time to drag my feet. but in reality, i've been dragging my feet for awhile now--doing just enough to get by in my job, and now crunch time is nearly upon me. all in all, that is probably a good thing.

and now that i have spent the last 5 minutes writing this post, it's time to get back to it!

looking for my beatrice...

i love it when steph finds new quizzes, and coming as absolutely no shock whatsoever, she and i both managed to end up as benedick.

i find this particularly humorous since for as long as i can remember, the relationship between beatrice and benedick has been one i have aspired to. to me, it is the perfect relationship...intelligent, full of wit and fiercely passionate. in my head, this relationship will never be boring, or same 'ol same 'ol. they will constantly challenge eachother, while simultaneously being completely devoted to one another.

so all these years i've been searching for my benedick, but it would seem that as I am benedick, i should really start searching for my beatrice? geesh. no wonder i am still single.

Benedick

Hark, Ye scored 73!

You are Benedick from Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing! Wryly sarcastic, but with a warm and loving heart, you look for love and happen to find it.. normally in the most unlikely of places.

You consistently need to assure yourself that you are not falling prey to love.. but everyone (including yourself) knows that you are.







Link: The Shakespearian Character Test written by LoudmouthLee on OkCupid

check this out

this video of slippey slidey (yes, that is official terminology) cars in portland is pretty wild (thanks justin).

dylan and kelly, for the love of all that is holy, please stay safe.

road trip rehab..um, i mean, recap

i thought i’d spare you the bad pun a second time around...let the storytelling commence.

i was on the road early saturday morning to make the solo four hour drive to ny. on friday, i had taken care of all the drive-time munchie requirements, and although none of my standard road trip staples (gobstoppers, hershey nuggets with almonds and toffee, and sour cream and onion pringles) were to be found, i settled on some tropical licorice, peanut m&m’s, and cool ranch doritos, as well as a stash of diet coke and water.

with the tank full, and the bank account tapped, i was on my way.

since purchasing my garmin gps a few months ago, i’ll admit that i have had some buyer’s remorse--simply as a result of not having had the opportunity to use it. however, i knew this would be the perfect opportunity to overcome my regret, but i did NOT know, that my garmin is actually a magical little box. in fact, it seemingly has the ability to actually shorten roads. i don’t really know how. it’s just a small silver little box, but it does. ...more on that later...

at any rate, the roads were completely clear. i mean, shockingly clear. particularly for a holiday weekend. i maintained a constant speed of 80, and managed to make it into the city to pick up deb in a record (for me) 4 hours. not wanting to search for a parking space, it was a quick pickup and we were on our way.

our hotel was located in newport, but i had always wanted to see providence. originally, we planned to stop in newport, drop off our bags, and then head onward to make our spa appointment in providence. once across to rhode island border however, we popped in the welcome center, and realized that heading straight on to providence made more sense.

when deb asked me why it was that i had wanted to see providence (as we were trying to decide what to do there), i had no answer. not only did i have no idea what i wanted to do, but i didn’t even have an idea of where providence was in the great state of ri. it was then that we realized that this trip was going to be the complete opposite of every trip we had ever taken together before.

we were completely open to whatever providence had to throw at us. which, somehow turned into a metaphor for life that was oft repeated throughout the weekend. each time, it seemed more profound than the last, in the way that road trip revelations always seem profound.

another important revelation from this trip was that rhode island really loves it’s dunkin donuts. i mean. it's serious business. between the dunkin donuts center and the dunkin donuts stores located on every block, it was clear that we weren’t in kansas anymore.

after our mandatory stop at dunkin donuts (really, they made us sign an agreement at the welcome center!!), we were off to meander around providence. our first exposure was more than expected. we were impressed by the size of the providence statehouse and fell in love with all of the gorgeous old houses on the hill. but...little did we know that that would be the best providence had to offer!

we found our way downtown, which for a ‘downtown’ area, was altogether too quiet. we walked the streets, looking for something too peak our interest. and we kept walking. eventually we decided that we would head back to check out the fabulous houses. we got a little turned around, and the garmin, in its only glitch of the trip, was no help. for a city so small, we managed to get incredibly turned around.

eventually though, we found what we were looking for, and wandered through tiny streets ooohing and aaahing over the homes and the city views being up on the hill provided.

then it was time to head back down and to the red door spa for our hot stone massages. we got checked in, changed into robes, and relaxed for a bit, before the treatments.

it was an ‘interesting’ experience. as i am not a frequent massagee, and my one previous experience with a hot stone massage was at one of the nation’s premiere spas, i probably went into this with unreasonably high expectations. this particular treatment was light on the ‘hot stone’ and heavy on the massage. in that regard, i was disappointed, however, my masseuse did work out some serious kinks in my neck and shoulders, which i am still reaping the benefits of.

when we had both finished and re-clothed ourselves, it was time to head on to newport. that was easier said then done, as no matter where how hard we tried, we could not seem to find a way out of providence. i am convinced that the garmin and the city itself, were conspiring to keep us there. but we perservered , and defeated the evil garmin, at which point, it was put in time out.

on the way to newport, we stopped for dinner, then completed the rest of the journey.

you may remember that i recently mentioned deb having spent new year’s in france. as it turned out, her living situation there was atypical from her previous travels. to say that deb is a five-star traveler, is to make a gross understatement. so when she arrived in france and found that the chalet she would be occupying, was slightly more cramped than she had expected, she began referring to that trip as ‘camping.’

i don’t think deb has ever actually been camping, but it’s safe to say that if she has, it has been a long time, and not an experience she is likely to repeat. this, for her, was as close to ‘camping’ as she will probably ever get.

so, after learning that she was capable of ‘roughing’ it, she decided that rather than staying in one of the higher end hotels in newport, we would stay in one of the historic hotels (a two star difference). not being that particular about my accommodations--as actual camping would have suited me fine (although admittedly, probably not in january)--i was amenable to her little experiment.

when we arrived, after 10pm, the doorman told us that we were the last to arrive. we thought he was joking, as it was a large enough hotel, that it seemed surprising he would know that. at any rate, the hotel was cute, and we checked in without incident. the reservationist confirmed our two queens, gave us the room key, and we headed to our quarters. when we opened the door, we found one king bed, and it was back to the desk.

it should be said that deb and i have shared much smaller beds than a king. both of us are ‘edge’ sleepers, and neither of us moves a great deal, so the reality of the situation was not at issue. for deb however, there was a principle at stake. i know that no room request is ever guaranteed, but deb wanted to know how it was that our room was given to someone else.

the fact of the matter is, the hotel was sold out. nothing was going to change that. we really were the last people to arrive, so i remained mostly silent while trying to gauge from eye movements what it was the deb wanted to occur. i would later learn that she was debating about asking for a refund--just on principle. i was slightly relieved that she didn’t, but we did walk away with free parking and breakfast.

we settled in and decided to watch a movie. i had brought my netflix booty, and we agreed on jane austen. it was ‘emma’ in minseries form, starring a young kate beckinsale. we plopped the mac in between us on the bed, and turned the lights off for the show.

earlier in the day, i had commented that traveling was simply an excuse to have an adult slumber party, and with our movie and our treats, cureld up in bed in our pajamas, it would seem that my offhanded comment had very real applications!

neither of us made it through the movie, which for me is quite uncommon. i can only justify that by saying that i had been in the car for a really long time that day!

on saturday, we woke naturally. no alarm clock. no wake up call. i remembered the whisp of a dream and relayed it to deb, which had her doubled over with laughter for some time.

it is common knowledge to anyone who has ever shared a room or a bed with me, that i sleep talk. not the mumbling, can’t understand me, sleep talking. the full on conversation, clearly enunciated kind of sleep talking. in fact, if i am sharing a room with another sleep talker, i can even engage in entire conversations in my sleep. no one has ever complained, though a few have been slightly amused.

the minute portion of the dream i can remember was having a conversation (not a real one) with deb, in which she told me that she didn’t think she could go camping with me anymore because she was too annoyed by my sleep talking. after confirming that she was not in fact, affected thus--made evident by her laughter and surprise--we rolled ourselves out of bed to get a start on the day.

at 10 we headed to breakfast, and by 11, we were out the door, and on to the breakers.

last week, when deb complained that none of her ny friends would go see the breakers with her, and i began considering the road trip, i asked her to send me more info. i must not have been paying attention, because when she sent me the link to a house, i was surprised. house tours are not my thing, yet deb and i always always have a good time together, who i was willing to give it a shot.

the weather was cool, but not cold, and misty, but not rainy. we drove to the breakers and found the first of three impressive houses we would wander though--the other two being rosecliff and marble house.



marble house had us trying our hand at an audio tour again, and as you may recall, our prior experience had been slightly disastrous. this time however, we were much more successful, and managed to avoid attempting to walk in different directions. i think it’s safe to say that we have been won over, as we like to move at our own pace, yet have access to information on demand.

following the house tours, we found parking at access to the newport cliff walk. simply a 3.5 mile walk along the coast, we were excited to be able to hear the waves and smell the sea as we walked behind some of the incredible houses we had just been inside.



we of course, took entirely too many photos, and amused passersby with our silliness. in fact, it is safe to say that that silliness is one of the best reasons i can conceive of for traveling with deb. i’ve highlighted and poked fun at some of her travel quirks, however, she is absolutely one of my favorite people to travel with. though we have different interests, we are always amenable to one another’s and can sincerely have fun, no matter what we are doing. i also find that we are more goofy with one another than we are with other people, and sometimes, that is a much needed release. not to mention that deb puts up with my excessive photo taking better than anyone else.

she actually impressed me this time around with the quantity of photos SHE took. we both love half-light portraits. there is something about the way a flash reflects in the mist on an overcast day that gives portraits (self and otherwise) an ethereal feeling. complexions are smooth, eyes are bright, and skin glows. it was quite a bit colder walking along the water, which only made us more determined to turn the gray day to our advantage.

after completing the cliff walk, it was time for dinner. we loved driving through town, checking out all of the adorable boutiques, and eventually landed ourselves at a local italian restaurant. when our meals came, we were both shocked at the quantity of food that was brought to us. i think it is fairly natural to assume a certain portion of food based on a certain price point--all relative to one’s experience. having our expectations blown out of the water was eye-opening to say the least. tasked with finishing an entire pizza (think papa john’s size, not cpk size) by myself, i came up dreadfully short. as did deb in attempting to devour her (what must have been) three pound calzone.

we left the restaurant stuffed and sedate, but ready to make the 3 1/2 hour drive back to new york. i released the garmin from time out, and as if attempting to make up for it’s previous errors, i noticed surprisingly, that the arrival time it identified was only 2 1/2 hours later. suspecting another fluke, i disregarded it, as i followed it’s somewhat backwards direction. but lo and behold, 2 1/2 hours later, we arrived at deb’s apartment. as i said....magic. i still cannot explain it. i had mapquested it, deb had yahoo mapped it, and both of our results had been the same--3 1/2 hours. i was not driving nearly fast enough to shave the time by an hour, so the only logical conclusion is that the garmin shortens roads.

we made it to deb’s apartment without incident. i was reminded of the irony in the simple fact that driving in dc completely freaks me out, yet driving in new york seems like an absolute breeze. it may have something to do with the fact that when i drive in new york, i am possessed with the spirit of a ny cabbie. i can’t explain it, but it happens every time.

i left deb with my car while i headed up to her new apartment to check it out. after five years, last fall, she traded in her mid-town apartment for a larger uptown one, and i’d not yet had a chance to see it. i immediately fell in love with it, as she had.

alas, it was time for me to depart. i had decided to drive home sunday night, rather than drive around indefinitely looking for parking, only to then risk monday’s holiday traffic. my circadian cycle also weighed heavily on my decision, as i knew i would be wide awake.

deb and i said our farewells, and it looks as though she may be joining me in utah while i am there cor corey and jill’s wedding, so we can do some skiing.

the drive home passed quickly. in fact, driving the same exact speed i had driven on the way home, somehow, this time it only took 3 1/2 hours. it was shocking, and again, all i can say is, the magic garmin shorten roads,

though a quick trip, it was amazing no schedules, no real agendas, getting a massage, waking up with no alarm clock, and most of all, spending time with one of my all-time favorite people. what a perfect unexpected 40 or so hours☺

for the rest of the pics, go here.

anonymous posting...

k folks, i have disabled anonymous posting. not because i don't want those of you who prefer being anonymous to stop posting comments--in fact, i really hope you don't, but because there have been a lot of lurkers lately, and there is no need to be shy. we're all friends here!

so come on...you can do it...nothin but smiles and open arms...