dear friends,

you are amazing. i am so lucky to have you, and i most definitely don't tell you that enough. thank you for your love and your concern.

let me reassure you that i am fine. not 'happy on the outside, dying on the inside' fine, TRULY fine. my recent return to singledom comes not with heartbreak, only with some disappointment at having to start over again.

i don't want to minimize the relationship by saying 'it's not that big of a deal', but in some senses, it's not. i certainly saw potential and hoped to see it realized, but i am old enough and FINALLY smart enough not to drag out something that is simply not meant to be!

there is no anger, frustration, misunderstanding, or regret. i enjoyed my time with him, and i care about him. he is a good man, and i expect that we will remain friends. long distance friends who talk every few months or so, but friends:)

i'm excited about staying in california. halle-freaking-lujah!! no offense to my portlandians, but that was an adjustment i wasn't super confident about. life is coming together here, and i'm feeling 'whole' in a way i never have before. i've been getting things in order, and not to sound all feng shue zen masterish, but i have been finding me, and i am loving the process.

i will say that i am over the online/long distance thing for awhile. which means i'm probably over dating for awhile (i don't know why--it just seems to work that way!), and that's okay. there is much adventuring and learning and settling (and job hunting) left to be done . so, here i go!