oui, merci

thank you to the recent commenters--i feel loved again.

*****

what the heck, i'm a yellow?

i retook the color code personality test earlier this week, and despite having been a red my whole life (and having countless people tell me i am 'sooo red'), imagine my shock and delight at finding i have jumped the red bandwagon for a happier, less dominating overbearing color!

Congratulations. You are YELLOW.

YELLOWS are motivated by FUN. They are inviting and embrace life as a party that they're hosting. They love playful interaction and can be extremely sociable. They are highly persuasive and seek instant gratification. YELLOWS need to be adored and praised. While YELLOWS are carefree, they are sensitive and highly alert to others' agendas to control them. YELLOWS typically carry within themselves the gift of a good heart.

YELLOWS need to look good socially, and friendships command a high priority in their lives. YELLOWS are happy, articulate, engaging of others and crave adventure. Easily distracted, they can never sit still for long. They embrace each day in the "present tense" and choose people who, like themselves, enjoy a curious nature. YELLOWS are charismatic, spontaneous, and positive; but can also be irresponsible, obnoxious, and forgetful. When others interact with you, as a YELLOW you respond to them best if they take a positive, upbeat approach and promote light-hearted, creative, and fun interactions with you.

*****

tomorrow at roughly this time, i will be arriving at the airport to board my flight for amsterdam. thanks to the time difference, deb and i arrive in amsterdam on saturday morning, at which point we will brave the 'windy, 90% chance of rain' conditions to spend some time biking along the tulip fields just outside the city. yeah. we'll see how that goes.

sunday, we will hop on a train to paris, where we will spend the following week in our apartment in st. germain.

the apartment is adorable, and theoretically in a great location, which should mean that we will be able to access a lot of the points of interest by foot.

trusty weather.com tells me that it will be overcast and raining for much of our time there, so hopes of retaking pictures in sunshiney flower blooming paris may be for naught. it comes as a slight disappointment since all of our previous paris pictures include cold, wet, and bedraggled us. in fact, i never remember being so cold as i was during our one day in paris. redemption is nigh, though perhaps not in such grand means as i had hoped.

nonetheless, the most important facets of the trip, namely croques, crepes, and onion soup (not 'french onion soup' because that is just silly), are sure to be in abundance.

i've exhausted my french vocabulary in the subject line of this post, which should make things interesting. oh! i forgot, i also know 'bonne annee', but i don't think 'happy new year' will come in very handy this time around.

*****

holy craap. is anyone watching 'lost'? i was disappointed with the first half of the season, and more disappointed at the extended hiatus, but they have more than made up for it in the post-break episodes. holy craap.

weekend update

april 2002.

i had been back from utah for about a month following my work at the olympics, and was deep in the midst of a job search.

i came across a 'temp' position that billed itself as an event planner, and i applied. i was brought in to interview and immediately connected with audrey, the interviewer.

job openings in my field were slim at the time, and though i had to swallow my pride in order to take a temporary position, i wanted to work, and i liked the people.

it wasn't long before i realized that this was not the smartest strategic move i had ever made. the duties of the position were more suited to a recent college grad, or someone trying to work and finish school. basically, someone younger and with a lot less experience.

i continued to look for other positions with no luck, but when the 90 day temp period was over, i knew i did not want to go permanent.

during that time i developed a couple of very good friendships, and it was with some sadness that i told audrey, my boss, that i could not stay. i indicated that i would be happy to stay on and train a replacement, if they would be flexible in allowing me to search for other positions. she agreed.

audrey and i

a month later, my replacement was trained and i still had no job to go to. on my very last day, the department took me to lunch. at the lunch, our vice president told me that one of our recent acquisitions was hiring an event planner. for the next couple of months they were still a seperate company, but come january, they would be one and the same.

the position meant changing office locations and commuting from ashburn to arlington, but i really liked the company and wanted to stay.

when i switched positions i offhandedly mentioned to my boss that at some point, they would realize they would need a corporate event planner, and i hoped i was still around when they did.

at the time, there were many corporate events taking place, but about 100 different people working on them. someone's assistant did this one, someone else's did that, some random person worked on this one...you get the point.

i spent a miserable two years in arlington. the commute took it's toll, and i was planning government meetings. while they afforded me the opportunity to travel, that was the only perk. the budgets were small, the clients were difficult, the expectations were higher than reality could support.

me and koh

there was one particular project that nearly killed me. i have never been so depressed in my life. the client was bi-polar, and often went off her medication, and the project manager was awful. she was my superior, and i actually told her at one point 'you are a bitch.' she replied and said 'you are incompetent.' i said 'then we are agreed in our mutual loathing of one another.' if you know anything about me, you will know that for me to say such a thing is only an indicator that i had been pushed beyond my limits, and not in a good stretching/growth opportunity kind of way.

i don't know why i stayed. mostly i think it was out of loyalty. i had an 'assistant' of sorts working with me on the project, and i knew if i left, she would get the brunt of what i had experienced. i liked her quite a bit, and did not want to put her through it, so i took it.

in the end, it was the best thing i could have done.

little did i know, that from the moment i had left, audrey had begun scheming to develop a corporate event planner position. she planted seeds, and waited for the right opportunity.

it took two years, but that opportunity did arise, and she (and i) pounced on it. it was a bit of a rough transition. my old boss and department in arlington cried foul, and told everyone they could think of that i had been 'stolen' by corporate, and they couldn't lose me and blah blah blah, yet my boss said some very nasty things about me in the review he conducted a short while later. i don't know why they decided to get territorial as i had not exactly felt the love prior to my departure.

let the good times roll

in addition, when i did move back to the corporate offices, i was literally told to stay under the radar, that there was no official approval for the position, but eventually everyone would forget that i hadn't always been there.

that's exactly what happened, and 90% of the last two years here have been productive, fulfilling, and just plain ol' fun!

that is largely due to my on again off again boss, audrey. she trusted me, and allowed me the freedom to work my way. often, months would go by without our speaking of work items. she woud hear feedback from events, it was always good, so she just let me do my thing. along the way, she became not only my boss, but a good friend.

much is changing around here these days, and audrey, like myself, felt that it was time to go. her last day was friday, and we took her to lunch to say goodbye.

it is a bittersweet farewell, as things will not be the same without her. yet, i know she is moving on to a better opportunity, and i hope not to be here much longer anyway! i also know that we will still be in touch, but for the next couple of months, this place is going to feel even more empty that it already has.

my two faves; koh and audrey

friday night, was a more positive experience, as i attended a fireside given by one of our lds general authorities, elder scott--one of the apostles. in some ways, i'll admit that i was disappointed.

when he told us that he would be speaking about 'making correct decisions'i thought i had hit the jackpot. that is certainly a topic i could use some guidance on at the moment! but what he ended up talking about was dating and marriage. i should have expected this as he was speaking to a group of young single adults, but i had hoped to hear a different 'spin.' nonetheless, there were a few new goodies, and it is never a bad thing to be in the presence of an apostle.

the rest of the weekend was quiet. i spent time preparing my sunday school lesson and planning the upcoming trip. deb and i leave for amsterdam on friday! yay!

the much awaited gala video

alright, i have to admit, it's hard for me to post this. i hate hearing my voice and seeing my face on film. seeing this video has really helped motivate me to drop some poundage (i'm down 6 since the event).

that being said, here it is, in all it's glory.

need some male advice

i have a date next week. a date that i need to get out of. one of my friends just went out with the guy and had a pretty miserable time.

i know what you're thinking, i shouldn't blow him off because of that, but trust me, if she had a miserable time, i will have a miserable time. i wasn't really interested in the guy in the first place. we haven't been communicating for all that long, and mostly i thought 'good for him, he's asking a girl out. what the hell?' i wanted to encourage that kind of behavior in general. but this is looking bad. the report was bad--not to mention that some of the 'specifics' my friend cited, are things that particularly grate on my nerves.

if i have to go on a miserable date, i think i may join a convent. so how do i get out of this? i don't want to be dishonest, but i also don't want to say 'my friend went out with you and said you are a terrible date.'

boys, where's the middle ground?

unsent letters

okay kids, maybe you remember my talking about launching a new blog that would house a collection of unsent letters. letters written for catharsis, or problem solving, or whatever, that were never sent.

well, we are off and running. check it out, and feel free to contribute. anonymous submissions will absolutely be respected.